[LISA, spoken]
I think what my father's saying is you're like a member of the family now.

[APU, spoken]
I feel that way too, you see...

(sung)
Whether igloo, hut, or lean-to
Or a geodesic dome
There's no structure I have been to
Which I'd rather call my home

When I first arrived, you were all such jerks
But now I've come to lo-ooove your quirks
Maggie with her eyes so bright
Marge with hair by Frank Lloyd Wright
Lisa can philosophise, Bart's adept at spinning lies
Homer's a delightful fella, sorry 'bout the salmonella

[HOMER, spoken]
Heh heh, that's OK.

[APU]
Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Now here's the tricky part
Oh, won't you rhyme with me?
Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
[MARGE]
Their floors are stick-E-Mart

[LISA]
They made Dad sick-E-Mart

[BARY]
Let's hurl a brick-E-Mart

[HOMER]
The Kwik-E-Mart is real... d'oh!

[ALL]
Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?

[APU]
Not meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[ALL]
Forget the Kwik-E-Mart
Goodbye to Kwik-E-Mart
Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?

[APU]
Not me
[HOMER, spoken]
Everything really wrapped up nicely. Hmm, much quicker than usual.

[MARGE, spoken]
I guess we've learned that happiness is wherever you find it.

[HOMER, spoken]
And we all found happiness. Every one of us.
Hey, what's that sound?

[APU]
Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
I do

[HOMER, spoken]
Hey, he's not happy at all. He lied to us through song! I hate when people do that!