[Verse 1]
His counterpart was hacked out by
A scalpel-happy physician
Uniball just moved into the central position
Grown so big, there simply wasn't enough room in the sack
Sometimes, a tiny part of me longs to have my old friend... back

[Chorus]
Uniball
Rolling away
Left you alone
Alone, you will stay
Uniball
Loading the gun
Solitary
There can be but one
Uniball

[Verse 2]
The odds are stacked against him
He could've surrendered meekly
Uniball still runs the baby factory uniquely
Single-handedly, he toils, from nightfall to the crack
Sometimes, a tiny part of me longs to have my old friend... back

(Bass!)
[Chorus]
Uniball
Rolling away
Left you alone
Alone, you will stay
Uniball
Loading the gun
Solitary
There can be but one
Uniball

[Solo]

Why, Uniball, have you forsaken me
Left me alone, here, in this fleshy prison?