Steve Martin
King Tut
(Spoken Intro)
I'd like to talk seriously just for a moment. One of the great art exhibitions ever to tour the United States is the Treasures of Tutankhamun, or King Tut. But I think it's a national disgrace the way we have commercialized it with trinkets and toys, T-shirts and posters. And about three months ago I was up in the woods, and I wrote a song. I tried to use the ancient modalities and melodies. I'd like to do it for you right now. Maybe we can all learn something

(Song)
(King Tut. King Tut.)
Now when he was a young man, he never thought he'd see
People stand in line to see the boy king

(King Tut)
How'd you get so funky?
(Funky Tut)
Did you do the monkey?
(Born in Arizona, moved to Babylonia
King Tut)

Now if I'd known they'd line up just to see him
I'd have taken all my money and bought me a museum

(King Tut)
Buried with a donkey
(King Tut)
He's my favorite honky
(Born in Arizona, moved to Babylonia
King Tut)

(Tut! Tut!)
Dancing by the Nile!
(Disco Tut! Tut!)
The ladies love his style!
(Boss Tut! Tut!)
Walkin' for a mile
(Rockin' Tut! Tut!)
He ate a crocodile
(Oooooh, wah-ooooh)
He gave his life for tourism
(instrumental break)

Golden Idols! He's an Egyptian!
Now when I die, now don't think I'm a nut
Don't want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut!
(King Tut)
He could have won a Grammy
(King Tut)
Buried in his jammies
(Born in Arizona, moved to Babylonia
Born in Arizona)

Got a condo made o' stone-a
(King Tut)