[Intro]
This is a song about the sorrows of the contemporary world
Which I know we all know so well
At least I read about it all the time
It's like one day, this was when I was in college, right?
And I woke up, 6:30 in the morning 'cause I get up early
And I put on the radio and they said, "You know
So-and-so truck driver today ran over his baby son's head and it burst like a watermelon"
So— and then they said it was 22 degrees out
So I figured on all levels there was no reason to ever go out again
I stayed indoor—
I stayed indoors for about eight months

Also— also passed with honors in Kierkegaard
That's 'cause I understand that [?] existential leap
Anyone who lies in bed at 6:30 in the morning listening to that has to
Anyway, after that communism was the only answer for me, I thought
And if you can't be a communist and make money, then you have to be a rock and roll singer
At least in Hoboken, so

So anyway, this is a song called "I Can't Stand It Anymore"

[Verse 1]
I can't be sittin' around
Living in a garbage pail
My old lady called me up
She tried to hit me with a mop
[Chorus]
I can't stand it anymore, more
I can't stand it anymore, more
I can't stand it anymore, more
But if Shelly would just come back, it'd be alright
If Shelly would just come back, it'd be alright

[Verse 2]
I live with thirteen dead cats
A purple dog that wears spats
They're all out living in the hall
And I can't stand it anymore

[Chorus]
I can't stand it anymore, more
I can't stand it anymore
I can't stand it anymore, more
But if Shelly would just come back, it'd be alright
If Shelly would just come back, it'd be alright

[Instrumental Bridge]

[Verse 3]
It's hard being a man
Living in a garbage pail
My landlady called me up
She tried to hit me with a mop
[Chorus]
I can't stand it anymore, more
I can't stand it anymore, more
I can't stand it anymore, more
But if Shelly would just come back, it'd be alright
If Shelly would just come back, it'd be alright

[Outro]
Be alright (Be alright)
Be alright (Be alright)
Be alright
Be alright
Be alright
Be alright
Be alright
Be alright
Be alright
Be alright
Alright, alright, yeah, alright

[Spoken]
Thank you