SIR Rap Battles!

Mario!

Vs

Link!

Begin!

[Verse 1: Link]

It's the Hero of Time, Yeah, the savior of Hyrule
Treat this track like Karting when I make sure that I rule
It's my World you're in; here I don't settle for second
Cause I'm the Legend who's destined to wreck this perilous peasant!

Threatening residents of his girl's kingdom when he's bashing bricks
A careless murderer; I wouldn't blame it on some magic tricks (uh)
Fact of the mattеr is, if Peach gets captured so oftеn
It's 'cause she doesn't want 'ya with how damn soft your Octorok is

Dropping the gauntlets; I doubt you could stomp this
I fathered a genre of games and I've not missed
So stop it, you couldn't soar above me with that feather you use
Man, you're useless if Luigi can Jump better than you!
Light up a pyrokinetic until he's crashing and burning
Hurting him worse than the poor ape that he keeps trapped in his circus
This athlete's out of shape, the second time I've faced a boar
Bitch, this battle's outcome was determined at the Game Awards!

[Verse 2: Mario, Navi]

The tales-a told of a man clad in green
But looking up to me, I see they meant you had mad envy
'Cause the industry we're in is like my baby, man; I carry it
Your verse was cold and lifeless, don't expect less from a Champion! (Oh!)

You've crumbled like the Bridge of Eldin- a missing link
Ironic that your Crossbow Training's where you're missing, Link
Your deeds have faded in Legend, the title's missing 'Link'
So when I'm through with you, nobody will be missing Link!

Don't need a rusty sword to split you down the middle with ease
Forget your ocarina, you play second fiddle to me!
I'm packing F.L.U.D.Ds that'd make your kingdom and your hearts sink
You're drowning in my shadow so bad, I'll call you Dark Link!

Call up your dead friends, they won' make this fight-a fairer
While I dribble basketballs, you dribble at the sight of Zelda
Switching up my style with Cappy, you're just ditching your hat
Befriended Ezlo only for you to de-Minish that Cap (Hey! Listen!)
[Verse 3: Link, Navi, Both]

You're right, he's got no cap, that just means he keeps on spitting facts
His spin attack will kill the beat, turn it to a Spirit Track (Yeah!)
Even at the verge of my Demise, I stand tall
Yeah sure you Jump, Man, now you just Pratt fall

That actor and I must've swapped places accidentally
'Cause he should be the one who's searching for his missing memories!
A century of slumber I was put in, sound asleep
And with your RPGs abandoned, what a fitting end for Alphadream!

[Verse 4: Mario, Cappy, Both]

You talk of dreams when your story is a fallacy
Your time in Koholint was nothing but a fish's fantasy!
Cursed to live in catastrophe, caused floods 'cause you're an absentee
It's tragic how your branching timeline's rooted in Calamity!
(Ooh!)

Our moons are bringing us on globe trotting trips
While your moon is only bringing the apocalypse
And you stole from Disney's pockets, trying to cash in their brand
From that fairy to design: a Peter flash in the Pan!

[Verse 5: Link, Mario]
Look, the truth is without power-ups, you'd fail to do shit
This coming from a guy relying on a worn- out toothpick?
That's stupid- Like casting out nostalgia bait to fish in the green?
'Cause your Triforce of ports is nothing but a pyramid scheme

You're one to talk, you'd Smash up pots around a keeper's shop
And use the rupees in their wallet to pay for your keys and bombs
Your thirst for Peach disturbs the peace I must defend
Well, finding items in the only way you'd get to touch a chest!

[Verse 6: Link]

You don't deserve ovation for your gaming services
When you drive racing fans away by thrusting in-app purchases
I'll swiftly end this skirmish quick and hurl him down the furthest pit
Envelop him in the same shadows that Luigi's lurking in!

I care for my steeds within the Hylian stable
Your relationship with Yoshi is just highly unstable
'Cause he fostered and protected you, all the while he risked his life
And how do you repay him? Fucking drop him off a cliff to die!

[Verse 7: Mario]

Made jumps into the movie scene, you never had a chance
They saw your awful pitch and off the bat, they had you scrapped and trashed
If you dare step into my arcade and enter in a quarter
I'll make like your Four Sword and leave you severed into quarters

Head back to your Shrine and rest, your style's tired
Ironic you mention ports, the price of yours have climbed Skyward
Link, it doesn't matter how many times you'll try to run this back
Your judgment's always Clouded when agreeing to another match