[TULIO]
I really don't have the degree
Of morals or integrity
I really shouldn't be a journalist

[MIGUEL]
Tulio, think of it this way:

Casuals are so easy to please
Getting pageviews is a breeze
Which rather suits us if you get my gist

[TULIO]
The gist, the gist, we need those hits

[BOTH]
It's tough to be the press
Under publisher duress
Be given trust when really you're a sham

[MIGUEL]
Be a tool of corporation
An opinionated hack
And for our cooperation
We are sure, to be paid back

[TULIO]
And who am I to question, if I leave a bad impression
If they say review my game, that's what I'll do

What's more, if we don't comply
With the game dev's wishes
I can see us losing hits or even jobs

[MIGUEL]
Oh no, don't want to end up like Gerstmann

So let's take bribes, the perks are great

[TULIO]
Yeah

[MIGUEL]
Easy money on a plate
Generous gifts should not be ignored

[TULIO]
Never ignore, never ignore the gifts from devs, no my friend

[BOTH]
It's tough at IGN
But if you just give out that 10
You'll be set, make good friends, that's how it goes (no denying it)
Just call everything perfection
Be a legend, of reviews
Take their ads, make a collection
As you rake in tons of views

[MIGUEL]
And if they offer you a contract

[TULIO]
You'd be crazy not to take that

[MIGUEL]
You got it

[BOTH]
So sign up two new gaming journalists
Journalists!