[Verse 1]
Lurk on 4chan all the day
Convince yourself that traps aren't gay
Prefer to play in 30 FPS
Tell the internet your home address

[Chorus]
It could be worse
At least you're not Anthony Burch
It could be wor-or-orse
At least you're not Anthony Burch

[Verse 2]
Ask /g/ for some tech advice
Think postin' vidya would be nice
Get told that you should die
Have your computer seized by the FBI

[Chorus]
It could be worse
At least you're not Anthony Burch
It could be wor-or-orse
At least you're not Anthony Burch

[Verse 3]
Give a guy on Steam your password key
Download LOSTBOY dot E-X-E
Be twenty two and stuck in high school
Have your full name be Christopher Poole

[Chorus]
It could be worse
At least you're not Anthony Burch
It could be wor-or-orse
At least you're not Anthony Burch

[Verse 4]
Think that /pol/ is intelligent
End up completely irrelevant
Buy stuff in free-to-play games
"Hey! I should really post with a name!"

[Chorus]
It could be worse
At least you're not Anthony Burch
It could be wor-or-orse
At least you're not Anthony Burch

[Verse 5]
Get stuck at a dead-end job in a cubicle
Waste your time on shit like /v/ The Musical
Be the head writer for a game studio
"Enjoy" an "open relationship" with your wife
End up divorced with her taking your Wii U
They don't rhyme, but if those things apply...

[Chorus]
You might be Anthony Burch
You might be Anthony Burch
You might be Anthony Burch
At least you're not
At least you're not Anthony Burch

[Spoken-word outro]
If you're ever feeling sad, just remember: At least you're not Anthony Burch
A message from /v/ The Musical