This, as you may have gathered, is the end of the movie
The entire cast is assembled here at the Centerville Recreational Facility
To bid farewell to you and to express thanks for your attendance at this theatre

This might seem old-fashioned to some of you, but I'd like to join in on this song
It's the kind of a sentimental song that you get at the end of a movie
It's the kind of a song that the people might sing
To lеt all of you in the audience know that wе really like you, we care about you
We understand how hard it is to laugh these days
With all the terrible problems in the world

Lord have mercy on the people in England
For the terrible food those people must eat
And— excuse me
And may the Lord have mercy on the fate of this movie
And God bless the mind of the man in the street

Help all the rednecks and the flat-foot policemen
And the terrible function they all must perform

And God help the winos and the junkies and the weirdos

And every poor soul who's adrift in the storm

Help everybody so they all get some action
Some love on the weekend, some real satisfaction
A room and a meal and a garbage disposal
A lawn and a hose'll be strictly genteel

Lord have mercy on the hippies and faggots
And the dykes and the weird little children they grow

Help the Black man
Help the poor man
Help the milkman, help the doorman
Help the lonely neglected old farts that I know

Well, it certainly has been swell being with you here, folks

If your name wasn't on the list of blessings we been passing out tonight
We don't want you to be pissed off

We don't want you leave that theater seat either

Forgive him for he knows not what he does, stop (As there's still more to come)

But before we go on, I'd like to introduce to you (On the other hand, maybe he does know)
My good friend and musical associate, Mr. Howard Kaylan
Who's about to give us the closing final benediction