[CATHERINE OF ARAGON, spoken]
But there’s only one that you need to hear from tonight. New York, I'm about to win this competition. Maria! Give me a beat. Ooh, muy bien

So, since the day I arrived in England, let's just say my faith has been tested on more than one occasion. First things first, I'm shipped over from Spain on the night of my sweet sixteenth to marry some prince called Arthur! And I'm like...okay. Then Arthur dies, so naturally, I'm imprisoned for seven years. Really helps with the grieving process, you know? But still, I'm like, okay, ugh! But thank God! They rescued me just in time to marry Prince Henry, my dead husband's brother. Okay, so I'm thinking 'bit weird', but if you seen him back in the summer of '09, lemme tell you, he was...okay!

So seven years later, we're still trying for an heir. He's trying really hard, and I'm like ugh, okay. Then he starts coming home late, "I was just out with my ministers". But there's lipstick on his ruff, and I'm like okay!

Suddenly he wants to annul our marriage, move some side-chick into my palace, and move me into a convent! Now, I don't think I'd look that good in a wimple, so I'm like, no way!