[Verse]
QUINCY
Each excellent grade that I manage to earn
(and I earn them with some regularity)
Can turn a bad day into one I would save
And keep tight in my mind for posterity

My schoolwork is full of inducements like these
Though 'inducements' might be a misnomer
Rather, sometimes I feel like a rat in a cage
Earning treats with catullus and homer

[Chorus]
But treats are essential and homer is nice
I read every textbook, sometimes read it twicе
What use is a student if they can't bе smart?
What use is an actor who can't play their part?
I can show every class I'm no fuck-up or fool
If I can be perfect, I'm perfect at school

[Verse]
This isn't to say I don't have any talent
My father and his father all had the knack
For learning by rote every fact, word, and note
Earning with effort the money they lacked
My father says I’m so much smarter than he was
Our grades and achievements are nearly the same
But he doesn’t get that I can’t lose my chance
When I’m stuck with long odds in a different game

[Chorus]
I stay up till midnight before every test
But tell all my classmates to just do their best
What use is a candle if both ends aren't burning?
What use is a course if I can't prove I'm learning?
Each test, quiz, and essay a practical tool
For proving I'm perfect, I'm perfect at school

[Bridge]
Each speck of earned affection
Like a fatherly embrace
Each positive reflection
Like warm sunlight on my face
Each grade a weighted finger
On my own unstable scale
Telling me to hold on longer
When I inevitably fail
Telling me I can avoid regret

(Other students enter behind them, holding papers with A Grades on them.)
QUINCY/STUDENTS
And I can’t give up on life just yet!
No, I can’t give up on life just yet!
QUINCY
Because maybe I can make it back
To being perfect, being perfect at school

[Chorus]
So I'll go to school forever
Become a grad, a PhD
With my total lack of self worth
And my boundless curiosity
Then I'll be a full professor
And cheer on each advisee
Saying, “Hey, you’re pretty special, kid
Someday you could be like me.”