[Verse 1]
It all happened so very quickly
I was thrown right off of my skis
And I was in the water trying to breathe
When a hand reached down and rescued me
(A-wugga wugga wugga)
It was a face that I thought I had seen
In many major million-dollar movies
And I could see y'all hanging from the trees

[Chorus 1]
I was surrounded by 30 dirty celebrities without makeup
Everybody looks like they just woke up
Everybody's so famous (Ah ah)
But without makeup, I can't tell who anyone is (Ah ah)

[Verse 2]
Now I still had mascara on
And they demanded that I give them some
And they asked which part of L.A. I was from
And if my agent could ever book them
(A-wugga wugga wugga)
And that they'd throw me in a volcano
If I ever told the things that I know
About the little blackheads on their nose
[Chorus 2]
If I exposed those 30 dirty celebrities without makeup
Lindsay Lohan on the sand beating coconuts
(Look at all the coconuts!)
Everybody's so famous (Ah ah)
But without makeup, I can't tell who anyone is (Ah ah)

[Keyboard solo]
(A-wugga wugga wugga)

[Chorus 3]
30 dirty celebrities without makeup
Everybody looks like they just woke up
This whole island is sinkin' (Ah ah)
But they can't survive without foundation (Ah ah)

[Outro]
Dirty!