[Verse 1]
In my heaven there aren’t no lawyers
Don't need names on dotted lines
Folks do business like they ought to
A good firm handshake works just fine
We feed lawyers to the lions

In my heaven there aren’t no children
Toting' loaded guns to school
Aren’t no such thing as peer pressure
Being who you are is cool
They still teach that golden rule

[Chorus]
In my heaven we hurt no one
No lying, crying, or dying young
No one's lonely, no one's scared
And anyone is welcome there
In my heaven

[Verse 2]
In my heaven I can sing like Elvis
Play guitar like B. B. King
Slide a fastball past Hank Aaron
Batter, batter, batter swing
I can do most anything
[Chorus]

[Verse 3]
I know that it's God's decision
What my heaven's going to be
And I aren’t telling him his business
But if he left it up to me

[Outro]
Then in my heaven
There's football with no referees
In my heaven
There's never been an injury
In my heaven
Angels yodel when they sing
In my heaven
The fish will bite most anything
In my heaven
In my heaven
In my heaven