You can't say cunt in Canada
Saying cunt's not very nice at all
No, you can't say cunt in Canada
So we asked the sheilas what they called it

And they said muff, moot, minge, quinn, twat, little flower, twinkle, tunnel of love
So if you say cunt in Canada
You gotta say it with a velvet glove
And, you can't say cunt in Canada

Now, you can't say cunt in Canada
So I thought I better ask the guys
Now, you can't say cunt in Canada
Why wasn't I surprised

When they said gash, pussy, poontang, beef curtain, burger, gateway to her guts
(Gateway to her guts? What was I smokin' when I wrote that one?)
Split whisker, beaver, long-eye, front bum, growler, hairy lassoo
No, you can't say cunt in Canada
Cause cunt's considered pretty fuckin' rude

No, you can't say cunt in Canada
So when I get to Montreal
If you're gonna say cunt in Canada
You gotta say it in French as well
So here goes: pilerplut, la cunt, President Mitterrand, *kiss kiss* Pepé Le Pew
No, you can't say cunt in Canada
Cause cunt's considered pretty damn rude
And you can't say cunt in Canada