It was long ago
Seems like a dream
The day I sucked the air
From a bottle of whipped cream
And I got real high
And things got real slow
And I started talking like this
What's going on?
I don’t know
And then I sold my car
For a Greatful Dead ticket
My dad yelled at me
And he grounded me
And he said I was a dick
It was the worst day of my life
And I'll never forget
But the very next day
I was doing bong hits
In the back of my friend's chevy
So don’t tell me
We're winning the war on drugs
Cause drugs are like a big ol' can of raid
And you're all little bugs
And don't tell me
To not get high
'Cause I'm as low as I can get
Without kissing your ass
And blowing you at the same time
Man, don't tell me about love and peace
When one of the Joneses have a handgun
Pointed at me
Don’t tell me to just say no
I’m an addict, I say don't let me go
Whatever happened to sex drugs ’n' rock 'n' roll?
Now we just have AIDS crack and techno

So they busted me
So I say "fuck them up"
For selling dope
And I went to jail
And I wasn’t forgiven
Like that little fucker who shot the pope


And he said I had the right to remain silent
And they couldn't explain
But I didn't resist
And I was invited
'Cause all I ever wanted was the right to remain
And they questioned me
Yeah, they asked me "why?"
And I said "fuck off"
I don't think I should be shot
For selling pot
It's just my little way of saying "high"
Now my record's all fucked up
Now two times a week
They make me piss in a cup
Well what I want to do
Is piss down their throats
Okay, here's the sensitive part
They told me
That times have changed
Cause our parents had
Hendrix, Janice and Jim
But what about
River Phoenix and Kurt Cobain
And they told me
To praise the lord
But I've been waiting for so long
For him to call me back
I think I'm gonna go pray
At Betty Ford
And they told me
That life was fair
I can't smoke a plant that was made by God
But I can kill my wife if I'm a football player
And they told me
They told me to just ignore
But I'd rather smoke crack
Outta Nancy Reagan's skull
While gettin' a blowjob
From Tipper Gore