I'm in love with Linda
I think she understands me
She's down in the dumps
She lives on Holloway Road

I met her in the Wig and Gown
We couldn't talk
With the music so loud
But I could tell she was intrigued

She took me down to her basement
She showed me all of her paintings
She sure couldn't paint
But she could kiss, oh yes

East London will never forget
All my wrongdoings but still
It's the place where I live

North London has a place in her heart
She's far too strong for me
That's what I thought at the start
I'm not that strong

After a week or two
I thought our love was true
She was my girlfriend
But I couldn't call her my girlfriend, oh no

The first time that she came to my house
She brought Chardonnay
Now I buy Chardonnay almost every day

And as her kissing got worse
Oh, her paintings improved
But what does that prove?
It proves nothing

On March the 23rd
She said something so absurd
She said you love to be in love
But you're never really in love

She said you love to be in love
But you're never really in love
Oh oh oh, oh my Lord

Every single day
I get down and pray
She'll change her mind
That she'll change her mind