[Verse 1]
I bought him at Thrift Town for sixty-five cents
If I had a kingdom, he would be my prince
His cuteness is too much for my tolerance
Frances, I love you

He's got a thick neck and his fur is brown
I don't need a blanket when he's around
I once was lost, but with him I'm found
Frances, I love you

Put me in a prison and put me in his cubicle
If he was on my fingertip, he'd be the cutical
If he is the nucleus, I'm the particle
Frances gee man, how'd you get so radical?

[Chorus]
Why'd you take Frances away (Oh-ee-ay-oh)
Why couldn't you let him stay (Oh-ee-ay-oh)
Why'd you take Frances away (Oh-ee-ay-oh)
Ah Frances, I love you

[Instrument break + Solo]
Guitar!

[Verse 2]
Yeah, me and Frances got a special kind of love
It feels just right, it fits like a glove
I hope when I die that I see him up above
Frances, you're the one I'm dreaming of

I bought him at thrift town for sixty-five cents
He's cuter than the artist formerly known as Prince
And he'd never make a joke at my expense
Frances, I love you

I gave him to a girl who was really sweet
And now, you know, she's sweet on me
And when I'm over he's between the sheets
Frances, I love you

[Chorus]
Why'd you take Frances away (Oh-ee-ay-oh)
Why couldn't you let him stay (Oh-ee-ay-oh)
Why'd you take Frances away (Oh-ee-ay-oh)
Ah Frances, I love you

[Solo]

[Verse 3]
So now the time came for me and Frances to part
Come on Frances, you knew it would be like this from the very start
I just can't bare to give you my heart
Frances, I miss you