[Verse 1]
Heard in on Sunday evening
Organized a bit of a do
Get off the phone, Mom
Someone important's trying to get through
(Number one)
Twenty-four seven promotion
(Number one)
It's hard work, but it's fun
(Number one)
Adventures start in shopping centers
(Number one)
Pray that we're number one
(Being Number one)

[Pre-Chorus]
A bed of roses
(Number one)
A box of chocolates
(Number one)
A bowl of cherries
(Number one)

[Chorus]
Being number one
Being number one
Being number one
[Verse 2]
A triumphant return to the home town (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
Treated with love and respect (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
A special school assembly (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
Before they would have broken my neck
(Being number one)
My favorite color
(Number one)
An E-type Jag
(Number one)
Roll out the red carpet
(Number one, being number one)
A glass of champagne, not the cheap stuff!

[Bridge]
God bless the public, God bless number one
God bless the radio, God bless TV
God bless pocket money, these are the days
(These are the days)
Of too much wine and song

[Chorus]
Being Number One
Being Number One
Being Number One
Being Number One
Being Number One
[Verse 3]
The skeletons dance out of the closet
Laughing all the way to the bank
A dozen illegitimate children (ooh, ooh, ooh)
I guess we've got Max Clifford to thank

[Pre-Chorus]
(Being number one)
Topper most of the popper most
(Number one)
Every truck driver's friend
(Number one)
Climbing up the airwaves
(Number one, being number one)
From John o' Groats to Lands End
(Number one)
You're watching you waistline
(Number one)
A second release
(Number one)
You sleep with the dogs
(Number one, being number one)
You wake up with fleas

[Chorus]
Being number one
Being number one
Being number one