It's a triumph, material triumph
Mass consumption and conformity
Down in hardware the shelves are stacked up
With the latest line in luxury
The perfume counter has make-up ladies
All immaculately make-believe;
They sell you lifestyle package
And you'd better buy
Because you're never going to leave

Nations of shoppers consume in a frenzy
The security of branded names;
They're fighting in the food hall
For exotic vegetables and fruit, eco-friendly game
It doesn't matter which currency you use
Becasue they're all exactly the same

And it's all on offer, everything's on offer
Multi-national door-to-door
In the Great European Department Store

It's on offer, it's all on offer, you can pack it flat to take away:
Scottish heather to Spanish leather
German turniip to Dutch weather-vane
If you've got the money the door's wide open
They are only here to pamper you
The ethnic art room has plundered several continents
To decorate your living room
It doesn't matter which credit card you use
Or if you even sign your real name
Because they're all exactly the same
And it's all on offer, guaranteed natural, quality control assured
In the Great European Department Store
Hey, let's shop; let's go!

In the Great European Department Store…

Ooh, the shopping's something shocking now;
Ooh, will the shopping never stop
In the Great European Department Store?