[Verse 1]
About a maid I sing a song
Tickety-tackety-tin
About a maid I sing a song
She didn't have her family long
Not only did she do them wrong
She did everyone of them in, (She did) them in
She did everyone of them in

[Verse 2]
Well, one morning in a fit of pique
Tickety-tackety-tin
One morning in a fit of pique
She drowned her father in the creek
Oh, the water tasted bad for a week
And we had to make do with gin, (Make do) with gin
We had to make do with gin

[Verse 3]
Her mother she would never stand
Tickety-tackety-tin
Her mother she would never stand
And so a cyanide soup she planned
And her mother she died with a spoon in her hand
And her face in a hideous grin, (A hideous) a grin
And her face in a hideous grin
[Verse 4]
Well she tied her brother up with stones
Tickety-tackety-tin
She tied her brother up with stones
And sent him down to davy jones
All they ever found were some bones
And occasional pieces of skin, (Pieces) of skin
And occasional pieces of skin

[Verse 5]
Well, she set her sister's hair on fire
Tickety-tackety-tin
She set her sister's hair on fire
And as the smoke and flame rose higher
Danced around the funeral pyre
Playin' a violin, (A vi)-olin
She was playin' a violin

[Verse 6]
One day when she had nottin' to do
Tickety-tackety-tin
One day when she had nottin' to do
She cut her baby brother in two (Don't try this at home!)
And she served him up as an Irish stew (Mulligan.)
And she invited the neighbors in, (The neigh)-bors in
She invited the neighbors in
[Verse 7]
And when at last the police came by
Tickety-tackety-tin
And when at last the police came by
Her little pranks she would not deny
To do so she would have to lie
And lying, she knew, was a sin, (A hideous) a sin
Lying, she knew, was a sin

[Verse 8]
Our tragic tale we'll not prolong
Tickety-tackety-tin
Our tragic tale we'll not prolong
And if any of you did not enjoy the song
You've yourselves to blame if it's too long
You should have never let us begin, (Let us) begin
You should have never let us begin, (Let us) begin
You should have never let us begin, (Let us) begin
You should have never let us begin, (Let us) begin
You should have never let us begin, (Let us) begin...

[Outro]
...-ver have let us begin, (Let us) begin
You should have never let us begin, (Let us) begin
You should have never let us begin, (Let us) begin
You should have never let us begin, (Let us) begin
You should have never let us begin, (Let us)...