A daughter of a farming man, a lass with raven locks
I met her at the Cock & Bulls, a tavern by the docks
Although we courted but a week, my love for her persisted
For when with her, we swived in ways I never knew existed!

Chorus:
She's a whore, yes a whore
A lass of myth and lore
A pontifex of oral sex
She'll ride you till you're sore
Yes, she's a whore, yes a whore
She is dear to fleet and corps
Her legs are splayed, we'll all get laid
By the whore that we adore

Her bosoms were named Mary, for they were pure and white
Her muff was named Elizabeth, 'cause it was nice and tight
Her nips were named Daisy and Rose, for they're like flowering buds
But her ass was named the River Thames, 'cause it is full of mud!

Chorus

Well, soon after we parted ways, I saw her with me friend
They courted but a week or two, but that came to an end
She then did hop from bed to bed, but what made me so mad
'Twas after several months had passed I saw her with me dad!
Chorus

One day, while at the tavern here, I heard unhappy news
This country lass had died of clap - oh, what a jewel to lose
'Tis not as sad as one may think, as I soon realized
For all those saints now pass her 'round that big bed in the sky!

Chorus

THAT WHORE!