The Ike Reilly Assassination
When Irish Eyes Are Burning
[Intro]
I belong to the staggering evening
I belong to the sweltering nights
I belong to the girl that's leaving
But all she wants to do is fight tonight
Piss into my Irish eyes
[?] with the loudest cries
When you ever gonna realize
All we're gonna do is fight tonight?

It doesn't matter if you're seventeen
It doesn't matter if you're twenty-one
It doesn't matter if you're thirty-three
Forgive me, baby Jesus, what I done

[Verse 1]
I went to see the Violent Femmes
With my friend John and his girlfriend
But right before the show began
He mixed it up with a girl named Tank
Now I believe Tank was a lesbian
And somebody cracks one, "Well, lez be friends"
She's Irish, too, and musical
Almost giant and beautiful
She threw the first punch, it was the last
Knocked John out cold flat on his back
Well that may be, she's like six foot ten
Got on her shoulders and I watched the Femmes
[Chorus]
When Irish eyes are burnin' bright
Drink your women, run for your life
The day'll be shot, they'll ruin the night
When Irish eyes are burnin'

[Verse 2]
Some time ago I went to a show
With a Serbian girl that I still know
It was Friday night, and as the show let out
I was rolling all over around on the ground
Under the lights of the marquee
At the Liberty Theater I was skinnin' my knees
I was breakin' my nose on the fist of a Croat
Smashin' my balls on the boot of one, too
Loosened my teeth, but I didn't really know it
I was bleedin' on someone and dreamin' of you
Just as the tide was beginning to turn
I saw the face of Kevin Moriarty
Matt and Jack and Pat and Eugene Graham
Frye and Quinn and Brendan O'Shea
Chuck Sweeney and John F Quigley
Were clean and sober but goddamn mean
Christopher Farley and James Ford Murphy
Were makin' me laugh when I looked for my teeth
[Chorus]

It doesn't matter if you're seventeen
It doesn't matter if you're twenty-one
It doesn't matter if you're thirty-three
Forgive me, baby Jesus, what I done
Forgive me, baby Jesus, what I done

[Outro]
I belong to the staggering evening
I belong to the sweltering nights
I belong to the girl that's leaving
But all we're gonna do is fight tonight
Piss into my Irish eyes
[?] with the loudest cries
When you ever gonna realize
We belong to the sweltering nights?