William Finn
Gordo’s Law of Genetics
[MINISTER]
The bad trait will always predominate
Bad trait is certain to win
The bad trait will always predominate

[ENSEMBLE]
That is the law of genetics

[GORDON]
According to Schwinn!

[WOMEN]
Smart or dumb

[MEN]
The dumb will predominate

[WOMEN]
Fat or thin

[MEN]
The fat will predominate

[WOMEN]
Lazy or not
[MEN]
The lazy will predominate

[ENSEMBLE]
We have (we have) lousy aesthetics

[THE MINISTER]
The bad trait

[ENSEMBLE]
Will always predominate

[THE MINISTER]
The bad trait

[ENSEMBLE]
Is certain to win

[THE MINISTER]
The bad trait

[ENSEMBLE]
Will always predominate

[ENSEMBLE]
That is the law of genetics according to Schwinn
[MIMI]
Why is the smart son always the gay son?

[GORDON/ENSEMBLE]
Schwinn's second law!

[WOMEN]
Smart or dumb

[MEN]
The dumb will predominate

[WOMEN]
Fat or thin

[MEN]
The fat will predominate

[WOMEN]
Lazy or not

[MEN]
The lazy will predominate

[ENSEMBLE]
We have (we have) lousy aesthetics
[LISA]
Say your father has a stomach
You are sure to get that stomach

[WOMEN]
It's a simple fact of science

[LISA/ENSEMBLE]
Don't rely on self reliance
You are sure to get that stomach
So eat, eat, eat!

[MINISTER]
Because the bad trait

[ENSEMBLE]
Will always predominate

[MINISTER]
Bad trait

[ENSEMBLE]
Is certain to win
The bad trait

[MEN]
Will always predominate

[ENSEMBLE]
That Is the law of genetics
That is the law of genetics according to
That is the law of genetics according to

[MINISTER]
Anything that's wrong is his father's

[WOMEN]
Anything that's wrong is his father's