Stephen Flaherty
Nothing Like the City
[TATEH, spoken]
Mister, please, where is this?

[CONDUCTOR, spoken]
You're in New Rochelle. You can take the rope off her. This ain't the city. 

[LITTLE BOY, spoken]
Mother!

[MOTHER, spoken]
I see! I see! He's afraid of losing her. Immigrants are terrified of losing their children. So are we but just not so conspicuously. Don't stare. It's not polite to stare. 

[TATEH, spoken]
He's a rude little boy. Ignore him. People of good breeding do not stare at other people. They acknowledge them politely with a bow—like this. 

(sung)
Good day

[MOTHER]
Good day, sir

[TATEH]
She called me "sir"
Without a doubt
We're really out
Of New York City
[MOTHER]
Fine weather, isn't it?

[TATEH]
Isn't it?
Now that we're out of the city
Isn't it?

[TATEH & MOTHER]
Nothing like the city

[LITTLE GIRL, spoken]
He's still staring!

[TATEH, spoken]
Never mind

[LITTLE BOY]
My father's at the North Pole
With Admiral Peary and Eskimos
Where is your mother?

[LITTLE GIRL]
Dead

[MOTHER, spoken]
Edgar!
[LITTLE BOY]
My name is Edgar
We're off to visit our fireworks factory
What is your name?

[LITTLE GIRL]
No name

[LITTLE BOY]
That's impossible
Everyone has a name
Even the little Negro baby
Who lives in our attic

[MOTHER]
Shh—do not be rude
He talks

[LITTLE BOY]
I never knew anyone
Who stayed on a rope
Like a puppy dog
What does it feel like?

[TATEH]
I see that
[LITTLE GIRL]
Safe

[MOTHER]
He also stares

[LITTLE BOY]
Safe?

[MOTHER]
You'd think he'd never
Seen someone
From New York City

[LITTLE GIRL]
Yes

[LITTLE BOY]
Everyone's safe
In New Rochelle

[TATEH]
That's children
Isn't it?

[LITTLE GIRL]
Safe?

[MOTHER]
Isn't it?

[LITTLE BOY]
Yes

[MOTHER & TATEH]
Always another surprise
Isn't it

[CONDUCTOR, spoken]
Boston Post Road trolley! Boston!

[MOTHER, spoken]
Well

[TATEH, spoken]
Well

(sung)
Have a pleasant day, ma'am

[MOTHER]
Have a pleasant trip, sir

[MOTHER & TATEH]
Nothing like the city

[CONDUCTOR, spoken]
Mamaroneck! All aboard for Mamaroneck!

[LITTLE BOY, spoken]
We know those people. 

[MOTHER, spoken]
That's ridiculous. They're poor foreigners. 

[LITTLE BOY, spoken]
Then we're going to know them. 

[MOTHER, spoken]
Who put such thoughts in your head?