Stephen Flaherty
Tax Man Max
[Verse 1]
Welcome to the new variety, sit and relax.
I'm that song and dance phenomenon, Max.
Let me sing for you, do my thing for you,
'Till they give me the axe.
Here's the song I'm doing, gonna fill you in on tax.
[Verse 2]
Tax is that familiar melody, sinful and true.
Hum it if you've earned a dollar or two.
Bucks are being spent by the government for whatever they do.
Anyone who earns a living gives more than a few.
[Verse 3]
So our schools can be their best,
So our roads will have no cracks;
Someone fix those train tracks!
I hear you callin', Uncle, and I'm payin' my tax.
Oh, these are my girls. Hello, girls.
Hello, Max. Nice outfit.
[Verse 4]
There are many different ways we pay what we owe.
Ladies, if you'll form a lovely tableau.
Income, property, sales, utility.
Candy bars in my show.
Licenses for dogs and cats, and that's not all, you know.
[Verse 5]
Out of almost every dollar a person can make,
City, State and Federal governments take
(Take what?)
What they think is fair you givin' your share;
Now and then there's a break.
Max is talking taxes,
Hey, have I kept you awake?
[Verse 6]
For the things your town may need,
For the things a country lacks,
All good things take greenbacks.
We hear you callin', Uncle, and we're paying our tax.
[Bridge]
People do complain,
Say their taxes are high;
What am I to get in return?
Look around you friend, Max is showin' you why,
With your taxes, you support
How we live and how we learn.
[Interlude]
Now here's the good news, Many things are tax deductible.
Which means their cost can be subtracted from the amount of income you'll be taxed on. Things like medicine, doctor bills, and supplies for your work.
So keep those receipts.
Be kind to your parents at tax time.
And remember April 15th.
April 15th.
[Verse 7]
What a showman you are Max.
Entertaining us with tax,
In those snazzy plaid slacks.
These slacks are for my business.
I tell you, I'll deduct them!
I hear you callin', Uncle, and I'm paying my tax.
[Outro]
His tax, our Max.
And I'm deducting my sax.