[Verse 1]
We got the 7" single, the long playing album
The 12" disco mix
Just put it on the jukebox, grab yourself a lager
See what the needle predicts

We had the country and Western, a dodgy little section
With Jerry Lee Lewis and gang
'From A Jack To A King’, to secure prison wing
But, still, the whole tavern, they sang

[Pre-Chorus 1]
Dolly Parton was queen
Billy Joel the boss
We were uptown, downtown, little bit of Motown
With Marvin Gaye and Diana Ross

All the punters would sing
And you'd be joinin' in too
’Red Red Wine', 'Everybody Hurts'
And 'Don't It Make Your Brown Eyes Blue'

[Chorus]
So barman, don't be a tease
Now we’re down on our knees
Plug that Wurlitzer back in
For the hes and the shes
Well, we’re begging you, please
For the Peter and Leighs
Stick another 50p in
And make it out-and-out cheese

[Verse 2]
Then there were the tightwads, going to the jukebox
Put in solitary 5p
Worked out that Pink Floyd, anything by Meatloaf
Was longer than your 10cc

Arguing the B side's better than the A side
Denying what you actually put on
Pretending that you hate it, you don’t even rate it
But catch yourself singin' along

[Pre-Chorus 2]
Neil Diamond was king
Elton John #1
It was a working-class hymn, but the one congregation
The Church really wished to be gone

Sang 'Give Peace a Chance'
With Yoko Ono and John
’Saturday Night's Alright For Fighting'
And 'Where Have All The Boot Boys Gone'
[Chorus]
So barman, don't be a tease
Now we're down on our knees
Plug that Wurlitzer back in
For the hes and the shes

Well, we're begging you, please
For the Peter and Leighs
Stick another 50p in
And make it out-and-out cheese

[Instrumental]

[Chorus]
So barman, don't be a tease
Now we're down on our knees
Plug that Wurlitzer back in
For the hes and the shes

Well, we're begging you, please
For the Peter and Leighs
Stick another 50p in
And make it out-and-out cheese