[Intro]
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
GODZILLA!
VERSUS!
KING KONG!
BEGIN!

[Verse 1: Godzilla]
From the depths of the sea, it's the king of the Monsters
I'll chew you up dawg. This Kong's getting conquered
I roll with Rodan, Mothra and the homies
For a social primate, you sure seem lonely
Your only friend is a damsel in distress
Who cringes while you sniff on her ripped off dress!
You're a simpanzee, I'm a lizard of thunder!
When I'm crushing on a girl, it means the foot she comes under
You're pathetic with the humans, enduring their abuse
Getting chained up and roofied on some goofy berry juice
I eat up a whole city like some Tokyoplait
You get spoon fed hot lead like "Here comes the airplane!"
How did dropping off the Empire feel?
You're like Jussie Smollett 'cept this beatdown is real
I got this battle covered like a bento lid
I'll make an ass out of you like Nintendo did

[Verse 2: King Kong]
(Oh) The only game I play is Rampage, Lizzie (oh)
It's beauty kills this beast and you just ain't pretty! (Οh)
No way your ass-brain is hanging with these monkey bars
You ain't got punchlines, you barely even got arms
You came off the base for Frankenstein first time we made a movie:
And I dunked on you like Barkley at the base of Mt. Fuji
Face facts cankles, you can't fill seats yourself
So they bring a mammal to nurse your films back to health
Don't you quote Snoop to me, I'm as old as death row
Reppin' RKO, and we don't love them ToHo's
The 8th Wonder of the World, and the word when I rhyme
And you think your mind can compete with mine? (here's your sign)
Just like your bad English captions, your words don't match your actions
You weren't even the bombest monster from the sea, G, what's Kraken?
So stay in your land of rising cold fish and rice
Come to New York and King Kong will bing bong, fuck your life!
[Verse 3: Godzilla]
You must be from Hollow Earth, all your threats are empty
I can blow you out with one breath don't tempt me
Monkey, that was some shit you just threw
Worst kaiju comeback since Pacific Rim 2! (Ooh!)
This is kids' stuff, send in Minilla
You couldn't measure up to the Shin of Godzilla!
Stick to tongue wrestling T-rexes and sea snakes
You're such a joke, Jack Black's in your remake!

[Verse 4: King Kong]
Titan your fish lips around Tenacious Deez
You ain't a Rap-Godzilla, more like prey to me
In Japan you were a metaphor for nuclear war
But in Hollywood, they left your balls on the cutting room floor!
And then the 90's didn't make you any cooler
What kind of bumpy chump gets punked by Ferris Bueller?
So go ahead and glow blue, Imma make you code blue
I'm an oxygen destroyer, and now you're O-2!

[Verse 5: Godzilla]
Oh, you shouldn’t try to talk about the atom
With the beast, the beast from 20,000 fathoms couldn't fathom
You could come at me with Iron Man and Thor, I'll still destroy ya
I'm Bigger than bridges and I'm slinging digits in triplets like Ghidorah
My voice cuts deep like I'm rubbing on a double bass
I spit the verse that turns Skull Island into Pompeii!
Serving up some animated rabbit fur flambé
It's the saddest death of a gorilla since Harambe
Damn I despise you, you make weak tokusatsu
Soft like some tofu; that's a Kaiju haiku
See me outdo you like I did to Mechani-Kong
Fuck you and the balloons you rode in on
[Verse 6: King Kong]
Anyways, that was more disappointing than your anime
Like '98, it's just another egg you laid
You ugly Mothra fucker!
Still don't know how you got pregnant, your whole suit's a big rubber
Got no fear of Gojira, I ain't hearing no monster verse
You're the only Honda vehicle that don't retain no worth
There'll be no victory dance, your G-fans will leave upset
Cause if you dropkick at me, I'll shove a tree down your neck
I'm the Apex great ape, great with the ape ax
Like All Monsters Attack, your raps are recycled crap
This alpha gorilla will be bringing no silverback
'Cause just like Bryan Cranston: you been dead since the first act

[Outro]
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF
(pause)
HISTORY!