Charles Strouse
You Can’t Keep a Good Dog Down
[Intro]
[CHARLIE, spoken]
Why settle for a couple o' bones when you can have the whole bank?
Ha ha ha ha ha!

[ITCHY, spoken]
Hey, Charlie!
Charlie, look!
You hit the jackpot!
Oh ho ho
Atta boy, Charlie, I'm proud o' ya!
Charlie, tell 'em!

[Verse 1]
(sung)
[CHARLIE]
Oh, you can’t keep a good dog down

[ITCHY]
No sir!

[CHARLIE]
No, you can’t keep a good dog down
I’ve seen pain and hurt

[ITCHY]
That's right

[CHARLIE]
I’ve eaten dirt

[ITCHY]
That's true

[CHARLIE]
It’s hard to buy but even I've been jilted by a skirt!

[ITCHY]
He lies!

[CHARLIE]
But look, pal, I’m still around

[ITCHY]
Haha!

[CHARLIE]
'Cause you can’t keep a good dog down!

[Chorus]
[ITCHY]
Ya can’t keep a good dog down

[CHARLIE]
No you can’t!

[ITCHY]
No no no no, you can’t keep a good dog down

[CHARLIE]
I’ve been bought and sold

[ITCHY]
He’s been warm and cold

[CHARLIE]
But ten to one I’ll still be runnin’ rackets when I’m old

[ITCHY]
Not in some cage in the city pound

[CHARLIE, ITCHY]
'Cause ya can’t keep a good dog
Can’t keep a good
I say ya can’t keep a good dog down

[Verse 2]
[ITCHY]
In him’s the luck of the Irish

[CHARLIE]
The pride of the German

[ITCHY]
And even, haha, a bit of Siam

[CHARLIE]
Siam? You see the come of the English

[ITCHY]
The charm of the Spanish

[CHARLIE]
A pedigree a-certainly ain’t what I am!
So call me a mixed up pup

[ITCHY]
You’re a mixed up pup

[CHARLIE]
Haha!
But the only way this pup knows is up!

[ITCHY, spoken]
OK, boys! C'mon!
Help me get 'im!
You get his leg
Lift 'im up! C'mon!
Didn't'cha hear the man?
Up! Up! Up!
C'mon!

[Chorus]
(sung)
[CHARLIE & DOGS]
Oh, ya can’t keep a good dog down
(Bow wow wow wow!)
You can’t keep a good dog down
(Bow wow wow wow!)

[ITCHY]
He’s been fat and thin

[CHARLIE]
I’ve been out and in

[ITCHY]
He tried a life of virtue

[CHARLIE]
But prefer a life of sin!
So tonight, man, we own this town
I’ve known hunger, I’ve known thirst
Lived the best and seen the worst
But the only way I know to finish is to finish first!

[CHARLIE & DOGS]
So watch out when you hear this sound!

(all of the DOGS howl uproariously)

[CHARLIE & DOGS & ITCHY]
'Cause you can’t keep a good dog
No, ya can’t keep a good
I say you can’t keep a good dog down
You can’t keep a good dog down!