[Verse 1]
The most chivalrous fish of the ocean
To ladies forbearing and mild
Though his record be dark
The man-eating shark
Who will eat neither woman nor child

[Verse 2]
He dines upon seamen and skippers
And tourists his hunger assuage
And a fresh cabin boy
Will inspire him with joy
If he's past the maturity age

[Verse 3]
A doctor, a lawyer, a preacher
He'll gobble one any fine day
But the ladies, God bless 'em
He'll only address 'em
Politely and go on his way

[Verse 4]
I can readily cite you an instance
Where a lovely young lady of Breem
Who was tender and sweet
And delicious to eat
Fell into the bay with a scream
[Verse 5]
She struggled and flounced in the water
And signaled in vain for her bar
And she'd surely been drowned
If she hadn't been found
By a chivalrous man-eating shark

[Verse 6]
He bowed in a manner most polished
Thus soothing her impulses wild
"Don't be frightened," he said
"I've been properly bred
And will eat neither woman nor child."

[Verse 7]
Then he offered his fin and she took it
Such gallantry none can dispute
While the passengers cheered
As the vessel they neared
And a broadside was fired in salute

[Verse 8]
And they soon stood alongside the vessel
When a life-saving dinghy was lowered
With the pick of the crew
And her relatives too
And the mate and the skipper aboard
[Verse 9]
So they took her aboard in a jiffy
And the shark stood attention the while
Then he raised on his flipper
And ate up the skipper
And went on his way with a smile

[Verse 10]
And this shows that the prince of the ocean
To ladies forbearing and mile
Though his record be dark
The man-eating shark
Will eat neither woman nor child