[Verse 1]
As a young and naive sailor I dreamed about the world
The fights and the adventures but mostly just the girls
All those exotic beauties that would meet us on each shore
But after a few months it’s amazing just what you’d settle for

The first stop on our voyage was an island rich and lush
Filled shore to shore with women wanting nothing to do with us
Someone shouted "thanks for nothing" and I admit that it was me
So we left the isle of Lesbos (Oh. So that's how it is.) and sailed back out to sea. (They had a great softball team.)

[Chorus]
It's any port in a storm, boys, any port will do
We’ve been out to sea so long things arе turning blue!
We’ll pay or pray for some rеlief, though it might be a sin
It’s any port in a storm, boys, and the clouds are rolling in
[Verse 2]
We sailed to a strange dark island and decided to explore
And met a tribe of pygmies a-standing by the shore
I found myself a female, she was a frightful sight to see
But one thing about her, she was the perfect height for me!
(I didn't even know they were pygmies)

[Chorus]
It's any port in a storm, boys, any port will do
We’ve been out to sea so long things are turning blue!
We’ll pay or pray for some relief, though it might be a sin
It’s any port in a storm, boys, and the clouds are rolling in
[Verse 3]
Then we found a colony on an island all alone
All of them were lepers just living on their own
But still I met a woman and I found it to be true
When you get a piece from her, you can take it home with you
(Totally got some. Wanna see it?)
(Too literal. Ewww!)

[Chorus]
It's any port in a storm, boys, any port will do
We’ve been out to sea so long things are turning blue!
We’ll pay or pray for some relief, though it might be a sin
It’s any port in a storm, boys, and the clouds are rolling in

[Verse 4]
We sailed to a tiny port just off the tip of Greece
And it had been oh so long since we’d had some release
We saw many native boys waving us in from the bay
And so we all decided we just don’t sail that way
(Bloodbeard!)
(Did you guys see 300?!)

[Chorus]
Now it's nearly any port in a storm, boys, any port will do
We’ve been out to sea so long things are turning blue!
We’ll pay or pray for some relief, though it might be a sin
It’s any port in a storm, boys. and the clouds are rolling in
[Verse 5]
So if you’re smart you’ll lock up your daughters and wives
It’s a good idea to hide your pets when we arrive
You should know if it’s not nailed down then it soon will be
Then we’ll pack up our gear and head back to sea

[Chorus]
It's any port in a storm, boys, any port will do
We’ve been out to sea so long things are turning blue!
We’ll pay or pray for some relief, though it might be a sin
It’s any port in a storm, boys, and the clouds are rolling in