[Intro]
Ladies and gentlemen, all rise please. The Honorable Roy Sludge presiding. 
(Gavel pounding)
Be seated. What's first on my docket today?

[Verse 1: Vance Gilbert]
A good look at you in that
Blue satin dress is long overdue
Oh, and please wear the earrings
I bought you in Kalamazoo
If you piled up your hair
Like a princess I wouldn’t complain
I love how the ringlets fall down
Like lovely brown rain

[Verse 2: Vance Gilbert]
I lost weight for this tux
Still a little bit tight in the thigh
And there's not enough hair left
To comb or drape over onе eye
And I don't recall this cummеrbund
Cuttin' me in half
Then you stab me while pinning on my carnation
And we both had to laugh

[Pre-Chorus: Roy Sludge]
Well I need a good reason
For you calling it quits
And why you're both dressed like you're
Puttin’ on the Ritz
And you tell me you never did nothin’
The way other folks do
Not you two
[Chorus: Vance Gilbert, Roy Sludge, and Both]
We’re going out the way we came in
We’re going out the way we came in
No need for no one to act like a jerk
You did twenty-six years and it just didn’t work
We got hitched at this courthouse
So there's no better place for it to end
We're going out, we're going out
The way we came in

[Verse 3: Roy Sludge]
If her daddy was here
Like the morning he gave her away
You could give her right back
None the worse
For her wear since that day
And your mothers and fathers would crow
That you just didn't try
Like they did all sittin' and waitin'
For the other to die

[Chorus: Vance Gilbert, Roy Sludge, and Both]
We're going out the way we came in
We're going out the way we came in
No need for lawyers to beat a dead horse
You had a good run but it just ran its course
We got hitched at this courthouse
So there's no better place for it to end
We're going out, we're going out
The way we came in
[Pre-Chorus: Vance Gilbert, Roy Sludge, and Both]
Now the bailiff is cryin'
He’s wiping his face
Stenographer’s typing
And she's losing her place
There was champagne and sandwiches
That we snuck in the back
'Cause my wife's second cousin
Caters at the race track
And we talked the court officer
Into throwing back the bouquet
There was poundcake and sherbet
Then we went on our way
I caught the Judge grinnin'
He was lookin' at you
Well I guess I'm a big fan
Of blue satin too
No, we never did nothin'
The way that other folks do
Oh, not me and you
Oh not you two

[Chorus: Vance Gilbert, Roy Sludge, and Both]
We're going out the way we came in
We're going out the way we came in
So keep your condolences
And the long sad face
You're looking for a funeral?
You're in the wrong place
We got hitched at this courthouse
So there’s no better place for it to end
We're going out, we're going out
The way we came in