If they put me in the jail
I wouldn't know how to go my bail
Have to get a lawyer to figure out the law
'cause I don't know gee from haw

CH
I don't know gee from haw
I wish I had some knowledge
It ain't no fun being dumb
I wish I'd gone to college

I believe my sweetie's cheating on me
Tried every way to find out you see
I talked to her ma, talked to her pa
But I don't know gee from haw

CH

Married a little gal and I got a divorce
Married her ma and it made things worse
I think I'll marry her old grandma
'cause I don't know gee from haw

CH

I'd spin a rope but I don't know how
Work on a farm but I can't milk a cow
Try to saw a log with an old hacksaw
But I don't know gee from haw
CH

That's why people impose on me
'cause I'm so doggone dumb you see
Should have taken a lesson or two
So I could learn just what to do

CH
..it ain't no fun being dumb, I wish I'd stayed in college