[Verse 1]
All lined up in a wedding group
'Ere we are for a photograph

We're all dressed up in a morning suit
All trying not to laugh

Since the early caveman in his fur
Took a trip to Gretna Green

There's always been a photographer
To record the 'appy scene!

[Pre Chorus]
'Old it, flash, bang wallop, what a picture
Click
What a picture, what a photograph

Poor old soul, blimey, what a joke
Hat blown off in a cloud of smoke

[Chorus]
Clap 'ahands, stamp your feet
Bangin' on the big bass drum

What a picture, what a picture
Um-tiddly-um-pum-um-pum-pum
Stick it in your family
Album

[Verse 2]
The same thing happened long ago
When man was in his prime

And what went on we only know
From the snaps he took at the time

When Adam n' Evе in their birthday suit
Decided to gеt wed

As Adam was about to taste the fruit
The man with the camera said

[Pre Chorus]
'Old it, flash, bang wallop, what a picture
Click
What a picture, what a photograph

Poor old Eve, there with nothing on
Face all red and 'er fig leaf gone

[Chorus]
Clap 'ahands, stamp your feet
Bangin' on the big bass drum
What a picture, what a picture
Um-tiddly-um-pum-um-pum-pum

Stick it in your family
Album

[Verse 3]
You've read it in a folio
Or seen it in a Shakespeare play

How Juliet fell for Romeo
In the merry month of May

And as 'e climbed the orchard wall
To reach 'is lady fair

As he tumbled, she began to bawl
As he floated through the air

[Pre Chorus]
'Old it, flash, bang wallop, what a picture
Click
What a picture, what a photograph

Poor young chap
What a night he spent
Tights all torn and his rapier bent
[Chorus]
Clap 'ahands, stamp your feet
Bangin' on the big bass drum

What a picture, what a picture
Um-tiddly-um-pum-um-pum-pum

Stick it in your family
Album

[Pre Chorus]
'Old it, flash, bang wallop, what a picture
Click
What a picture, what a photograph

Poor young chap
What a night he spent
Tights all torn and his rapier bent

[Chorus]
Clap 'ahands, stamp your feet
Bangin' on the big bass drum

What a picture, what a picture
Um-tiddly-um-pum-um-pum-pum

Stick it in your family
Album

[Outro]
Stick it in your family
Stick it in your family
Stick it in your family
Album