(Verse)
In B.C. 33
Ah me!
That's a dashed long time ago
There lived a Roman hero
Who had shaken hands with Nero
And the history you should know
He was introduced to the king of Gaul
Whoever that might be
And crossing in a galley
With a Norman wench got pally
They went and founded me

(Chorus)
So if you wonder what a duke should be
Just you take another look at me
I'm doughty
I'm gouty
I'm wonderful to see
All my people, 'pon my soul it's true
Look on Noah as a parvenu
By gad, you can search your family tree
But you'll never find a duke like me

(Verse 2)
When old Canute
Was buying fruit
One day, so runs the tale
A young convicted felon
Brought him a juicy melon
And was then released from jail
This noble youth
To tell the truth
Sailed right away to sea
And the Duke of Malta's daughter
Brought up his shaving water
And the grand result was me!
(Chorus)
So if you wonder what a duke should be
Just you take another look at me
I'm doughty
I'm gouty
I'm wonderful to see
All my people, 'pon my soul it's true
Look on Noah as a parvenu
By gad, you can search your family tree
But you'll never find a duke like me
You'll never find
You'll never find a duke like me