The world today seems absolutely crackers
With nuclear bombs to blow us all sky high
There's fools and idiots sitting on the trigger
It's depressing, and it's senseless, and that's why...

I like Chinese
I like Chinese
They only come up to your knees
Yet they're always friendly and they're ready to to please

I like Chinese
I like Chinese
There's nine hundred million of them in the world today
You'd better learn to like them, that's what I say

I like Chinese
I like Chinese
They come from a long way overseas
But they're cute, and they're cuddly, and they're ready to please

I like Chinese food
The waiters never are rude
Think of the many things they've done to impress
There's Maoism, Taoism, I Ching and chess

I like Chinese
I like Chinese
I like their tiny little trees
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their ying and yang-eze
I like Chinese thought
The wisdom that Confucius taught
If Darwin is anything to shout about
The Chinese will survive us all without any doubt

So, I like Chinese
I like Chinese
They only come up to your knees
Yet they're wise, and they're witty, and they're ready to please

All together now:
我爱中国人
我爱中国人
我爱中国人
你好吗, 你好吗, 你好吗, 再见

I like Chinese
I like Chinese
Their food is guaranteed to please
A fourteen, a seven, a nine and lychees

I like Chinese
I like Chinese
I like their tiny little trees
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin and yang-eze
I like Chinese
I like Chinese
[Fade out]