Ever heard the one about the boy from Ballymun?
Who was told once, while napping, he looked like John Lennon
So he went out and found himself a girl from Kyoto
But never spoke to her

Don’t believe the hype
You havn’t got a type
The complexities of your heart and soul and you could share it with and what it could be like
Are insulted every day in magazines and on T.V

But if you run away
I will seek everyone’s applause
And if you can my name
I will crawl back into your jaws

Stop me if you’re bored
'Cause you heard this one before
But once upon a time, a well endowed girl from Fettercairn was born
To a failed model and brick layer
And a seed was sown

At karaoke night
She exposed herself for the benefit of Mr. Kite
Won a crate of Smirnoff Ice
Was quickly whisked off to appear in the tabloids
Spent the next thirty getting fucked by talentless 'C' celebrities

But if you run away
I will seek everyone’s applause
And if you can my name
I will crawl back into your jaws

I am looking at the world tonight
I am looking through my baby’s eyes
I’m the most dangerous guy alive when I don’t drink
Now I’m just showing off to be reviled
I’m leaning towards the shallow side
I’m the most dangerous guy alive ‘cause I say what I think

But if you run away
I will seek everyone’s applause
And if you can my name
Then I will crawl back into your jaws

How do you like me now?
How do you like me now?