Eminem
Van vs. Ham
[Intro: Eminem]
1, 2, 6, 8, 10

[Verse 1: "Vanilla Ice" (M&M)]
Yo! I'm Back, to bust another fresh track
You say, that I have the ability to fly
Fly right past ya ass, when I blast
Ya every time I grab the mic, I crash a
'Nother rhyme it's a crash landin'
Every time I grab the mic, I'm kinda outstandin'
'Cause no one can step to a single a rhyme
And I say " Yo, what kept you?"
Home's, you going too slow
You're too slow for the flow and I know
That M&M is returning
To bust the rhyme and suckers are learning
That when I kinda go offbeat a little bit
I step back to the rhyme and say
That I bust a rhyme all day
Make a sucka say "Hey!
I cannot step to you M&M
'Cause you are so bad, Damn
You're the baddest motherfucker in the whole damn land"
And you're right, 'cause I am
And I don't go offbeat, not once
'Cause I grab the mic and bust for months
And I don't give nobody another turn
'Cause every time I grab the mic, I don't let a brother burn
Because he can't step to a single rhyme that I do
'Cause you knew you're through
[Verse 2: "MC Hammer" (Maximum)]
Yeah, yeah, oh yeah
Now I grab the microphone, you know I am imperial
Bassmint Productions' that's rockin' yo stereo
Don't front with me, 'cause I am the boy
I get on the microphone and I destroy
Now you can take a body, that's not from Oakland
Hammer, Hammer, Hammer keeps on choking, yeah
I can do it right and nobody will know
For I am the Hammer and I'm running the show
They come from West Indies, South of California
I wake you motherfuckers up, early in the morning, yo front!

[Interlude: "Vanilla Ice" (M&M) & "MC Hammer" (Maximum)]
Yo Hammer, that was pretty good man
I don't think I can step to you man, I don't know
I'm great!
I'll just try but it seems like you outdo me, no matter what I do
Here I go anyway

[Verse 3: "Vanilla Ice" (M&M)]
Here I am, back to attack the whole damn land
'Cause you know that Vanilla Ice is hype
I grab this mic and I rhyme all night
MC Hammer cannot step to me
Because I got the rhymes and I'm truly
So damn hype and the place to be
I'm rhyming on the mic on the M-I-C
M-I-C is the abbreviation
I grab the mic and rock the whole nation
You know that Vanilla Ice, is so precise and I get so nice
Get so nice, I start developing manners
And I whoop your brain like scanners
Because Vanilla Ice is bad
Now what you got to say about that dad?
[Interlude: "MC Hammer" (Maximum)]
You can't step to me boy, I sell more records!
Yo, I know here I go, ay yo, Manix, gimme something, yeah, nah!

[Verse 4: "MC Hammer" (Maximum)]
Every time I go, you know I like to start
My name is MC Hammer
I rule hip-hop charts
Seven million, seven million, seven million sold
And your shit barely even touch gold!
Now everywhere I go, they know that I'm a star
I'm the H-A-M, the M-E-R
'Cause every time I rock it they know I rock the mic
I am MC Hammer
And you know what I am like, roar!

[Interlude: "Vanilla Ice" (M&M) & "MC Hammer" (Maximum)]
I don't know man, I think you got me, man, I don't know, I'ma try Check this out, fallin'
Ain't no one here you sucka!

[Verse 5: "Vanilla Ice" (M&M)]
Fallin' on the concrete real fast
Jumped in the car, slammed on the gas
Bumper to bumper the avenue's packed
I try to get away 'cause the jackers jack
So I step to the rhyme and I just say I'm
Gonna bust a rhyme for the whole damn mind
Then you say that I cannot bust a rhyme
But you gonna get got MC Hammer
Because you know you get on the mic
And drop poor grammar
And you can't slam a jam because I know that I am the man
And all the teenagers they like me
You know why? It's a scheme agents
Have developed to sell me
Because I bust a rhyme so cleverly
And you know that I got knowledge
'Cause I'm in show biz
And I bust a rhyme all the time
So MC Hammer you cannot step to
A single rhyme that I do 'Cause I knew
That you are through, you are washed up
Oh, so step to the bathroom
And I told you that I have to scold you
Because I am Vanilla Ice
I grab this mic and I get so precise
And you cannot step
So why don't you get swept?
[Interlude: "MC Hammer" (Maximum)]
Now you makin' me mad boy
Now I'm gonna get your ass
Now you gonna know who's on this motherfuckin' mic, yo!

[Verse 6: "MC Hammer" (Maximum)]
It's about time that I turned out your lights
Now I see the Vanilla Ice tryin' a chill in my freezer
You just don't know that your mama is a geezer
She say Hammer, yo Hammer, yo Hammer Hammer Hammer
But she jump on me because I'm a bad mamma jamma
I did your bitch, Hammer don't play
I got the funky shit and it goes this way
I wish your whole ass try to step, you can't touch this
You fuck with the Hammer you'll be walking on crutches
Yeah that's what I'm sayin', I ain't playin'
I'm Hammer, I'm Hammer, yes it's the Hammer Man
My lips may be big but I can rap better
Then looking at your ass, you look like a piece of cheddar!
Yo though you steppin' to me, you know it's no dream
I dig Vanilla Ice and turn his ass into whipped cream
So you know who's the best by far
It's the muthafuckin' HammeR with a capital R, roar!

[Interlude: "Vanilla Ice" (M&M) & "MC Hammer" (Maximum)]
Now you made me mad, and you know what happens when you make Vanilla Ice mad Hammer?
What?
I don't like it. So yo!
You scared boy?
I ain't scared of you, Hammer, I'm just thinking, I gotta think of something clever
(Ice Ice baby, too cold too cold)

[Verse 7: "Vanilla Ice" (M&M)]
When I'm through with you
You'll be goin' to heaven
Cuz I smash the glasses and fuck 3-5-7
24/7 they was bangin' my cock
I said "yo fuck Hammer
Get a piece of the rock, yeah"
I said yeah. My name is Vanilla Ice, you can't
Step to me, you thought that you was a champ
But I stepped on your ass like a piece of carpet
And rented you for sale like an upstairs apartment
Yo, that's my clever metaphor
And every time I grab the mic you know
Kids like me cuz I'm better for
Their ears, because their mothers and parents
Like to hear the way I rhyme and I make an appearance
And say hey, I got a blond streak
And that's why people like me cuz I'm hard as concrete
I'm always on beat when I do this show
You know that Vanilla Ice has to go cuz I'm so damn fresh!

[Verse 8: "MC Hammer" (Maximum)]
Now you steppin' to me punk
There is no maybes
You steppin' to me wrong and I'm gonna ICE ya baby!
So you say what's the matter, why Hammer loves to rap
Cuz all that shit you talkin' to Hammer is bullcrap
Now I know a rhyme every day I'm ready
I'm down with Dougie Fresh, Van-L is not ready
Now everywhere I go, on MTV Rap
They know I'm the best cuz now I don't take no crap
Now Vanilla Vanilla he's beaming out Hammer
They say yo Hammer don't put me on the slammer
I said yo sucka, stupid muthafucka
You messin' with me but I'm no sucka
I already pumped it up, and already got it started
So steppin' to me white muthafucka you'll feel broken-hearted
So I'm gonna pass the mic and you know about me
Hammer get off the fuckin' mic!!! I'm outie!

[Outro: "Vanilla Ice" (M&M)]
You blew me out, man, you beat me