Eminem
Pooh-Butt Day
[Intro: DMC & Chaos Kid]
(Oh yeah)
Oh yeah, a pooh-butt day
One of those sticky type of things (Oh yeah)
That you can just swing upon
Check it out (Oh–, yeah)

[Verse 1: Chaos Kid]
Get up this morning, I'm feelin' sleepy as all hell
Went to use the bathroom then I tripped and I fell
All the way downstairs onto the couch
And I pissed my pants on the way down south
So I went back upstairs to change my underwear
Took a while to get 'em unstuck to my pubic hair
Finally got unzipped I went to put 'em down the street
But then I threw 'em in the garbage cause it all said "Pew"
Hopped in the shower, put shampoo in my hair
Went to rinse it out but then the water wasn't there
That damn plumbing, it must've went foul
Got another bath to wipe the stuff up with the towel
Went to get my clothes but my [?] were in the wash
So I sat and played Super Mario on my Nintendo
I was gonna see my girl but I forget that stuff
Man today I just feel like a pooh-butt

[Chorus: Chaos Kid & DMC]
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know, I- I just feel like a pooh-butt today
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know, I just feel like a pooh-butt today (Oh yeah)
[Verse 2: Chaos Kid]
Every single day I make a habit to get up
But today I just feel like a pooh-butt
So I'll stay in bed, I don't know whats wrong with me
I'm just takin' everythin' nonchalantly
I just feel like I can't move one muscle
My girlfriend calls me up and tells me that we gotta hustle
My plane leaves to Rome about quarter to eight
It's 7:15 looks like I'm gonna be late
Aw, forget that, baby, said, "I just can't make it"
I know you're disappointed, but you're gonna have to take it
I'm sick in bed I'm makin' [air-fair footer?]
But before I hung up the phone she told me where I could put it
Comes next day I got a call from M&M, he said
"We gotta make a record, get ya butt outta bed"
I said, "I ain't doin' nothin', I wish you nothin' but luck,"
He said, "What's up?" I said I feel like a pooh-butt

[Chorus: Chaos Kid & DMC]
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know, I- I just feel like a pooh-butt today
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know, I just feel like a pooh-butt today (Oh yeah)

[Break: Chaos Kid, M&M & DMC]
Yo, you ever have one of those pooey, stinky
Ridiculous, rotten days, M&M?
Yeah, man, I had one once, check this out (Yeah)
[Verse 3: M&M]
Woke up, 6:30 in the mornin', yawnin'
Gotta get to the recording studio
I gotta get a take done
Put all my rhymes together so I can make one
Get outta bed, fall on my head
Slipped on the rug, I thought I was dead
Cussin', I think my head is busted, but it's really nothin'
Only a concussion, shake it off
Get off the ground, look around
Couldn't find my rhyme sheets, where'd I put 'em down?
They were just there last night on the chair
Had to look everywhere but couldn't find 'em anywhere
Go to the basement might of misplaced 'em
Gotta find 'em in hurry, but my visions still blurry
Goin' down the stairs, what could happen next?
But, when it's this early you can't skip steps
Fallin' head first, as I fall, I curse
Things are lookin' bad and might only get worse
Achin', I'm shakin' the hurt off, stand up slowly
Wiped all the dirt off, memory lapse
I can't remember nothing, think I'll collapse
[?] forget the whole thing pause for a second
What was I lookin' for? Oh yeah, my rhyme sheets
They might be on the floor or on the chair
Wait a minute where am I? I'm in a basement
Damn, how time flies, think for a second, recall my memory
If I was a rhyme sheet, where would I be?
Now I remember, I put 'em in the closet next to my jacket
So I wouldn't ever lost 'em, already 7:00
I've only got a hour to eat breakfast
Get dressed, plus take a shower
Got undressed, grabbed the [?] off the rack
Turn the water on and I almost had a heart attack
Cold as hell, started to yell
Jumped out the shower and said, "Fuck it, I'll smell"
Grabbed the towel off the rack, dried off got dressed
Still had to eat, plus my hair was a mess
I was in a rush, grabbed the brush
And ran, right into the door, on the floor I land
Always used to flake, I know I'm cursed
I think it might help if I open the door first
Tried to turn the handle but I sprained my wrist
But that's what happens on a day like this
[Chorus: Chaos Kid]
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know, I- I just feel like a pooh-butt today
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know, I just feel like a pooh-butt today

[Break: Chaos Kid & M&M]
Wow, that sounds pretty pooey to me
Now, I'm gonna break it down
For all the people who don't know what a pooh-butt day is

[Verse 4: M&M & DMC]
Now, a pooh-butt day is somethin' everybody's had
No particular depression, neither mad or sad
You [?] your [?] because [?] is what it is
When you're feelin' like a pooh-butt then you're feelin' like shit
They come up at a certain time, they don't have a season
And most of the time you feel like one for no particular reason
They get a careless attitude, the yucky sensations
Some people won't accept love in a pooey situation (Oh yeah)
Sittin' on the toilet for an hour or so
Marks on the butt from the seat on the bowl
Grab a toilet paper and the seat and just wipe
When I realize I may have sat the in the seat too tight
So I struggle to [?] from a stuck position
But removin' myself was an impossible mission
Screamin' to get out, I couldn't take it any more
When my mother arrived and knocked upon the door
We pulled and pulled and I was removed from the seat
I couldn't sit down for a whole damn week
Never again will I get caught in that rut
So I can stay fresh instead of feelin' like a pooh-butt

[Chorus: Chaos Kid]
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know, I- I just feel like a pooh-butt today
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know, I just feel like a pooh-butt today

[Verse 5: M&M, Manix]
Well the very next day, [?]
Felt the pooh-butt sick but am I defeated I survived
So I went downstairs and managed not to fall
Since I was feelin' better I give Manix a call
Well, [?] said "Oh", says
"Ey s-wzup what up, you gotta go?"
"I'm feelin' pretty good, what about if I come over?
We can practice for a while, order the pizza, are you sober?"
He said, "I caught a cold, nope, I'm not goin'
You wanna know the reason why I sound like [?]?
It's not because I got pneumonia, I'm [?] somethin' to do, but uhm
If you could smell the way I'm sayin', you'd be sayin' 'pew!'"
I thought for a second and I said, "I don't get it"
Manix said, "just forget it home's
I ain't goin' out in this weather
I don't feel like doin' nothin' but I leavin' you too it
Don't be comin' over feelin' 'cause I'm feelin' like pooh!"
Pooh, pooh, pooh, pooh
Pooh, pooh, pooh, pooh (Oh yeah)

[Chorus: Manix]
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know I, I just feel like a pooh butt today (Oh yeah- yeah)
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know I, I just feel like a pooh butt today (Oh yeah)
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know I just feel like a pooh butt today
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know I just feel like a pooh butt today (Oh yeah)
Sometimes things just never go my way
I just feel like a pooh butt today
Sometimes things just never go my way
You know I just feel like a pooh butt today (Oh yeah)

[Outro: Chaos Kid, M&M]
Pooh butt! I feel like a pooh butt!
Sometimes I feel like a pooh butt!
When you just can't get up
When you feel like you want to stay in bed all day
That's an example of a pooh but day
Ooooooh, pooh butt, oh!
My example of a pooh butt day
Is when you have a foot falls asleep, for the whole day
But you've got a track run at one o'clock!
You know what pisses me off, is when we get all the parts down except James gets a lag on his throat and he fucks up, and you know what else pisses me off is, whatever's pissin' me off in that particular moment, that's what's usually pissin' me off
I'm gonna end this song by sayin', uh
Pooh buuutt!