Far over, the misty mountains's cold
To dugeons deep, and caverns old
We must away, ere break of day
To find our long forgotten gold
With the past long and dark as the beard on my face
I lead a company of dwarves at a frivalous pace
Until Eregor is mine again we take no breaks
The son of thrain straight lays battlefields to waste
With the blade of deathless and my shield of oak
And blood from every orc throat stained on my thick cloak
I rise from Smaug's final breath of smoke
And take back my gold, leave him desolate and broke
But I can't assume my throne in my underground court
Without the aid of a thief who I ironically dwarf
Hey yo Bilbo
Yeah?
You got sting?
Oh yeah!
Found your courage?
Hell yeah!
And that ring?
Uhh what?
The pines were roaring on the height
The winds were moaning in the night
The fire was red, it flaming spread
The tress like torches blazed with light
Ah yo I stepped out the shire bare foot and gutless
Once a nice little hobbit now I am one you don't fuck with
'Cause now I've got an army, new sword to cut with
And the one ring baby sauron can suck it!
I spit riddles sharper than daggers, craft lyrical ladders
And elevate my status from Bagend to Rivendel
My name will be established for the elvish swagger
Bring the arkenstone home and prove size don't matter!
Watch me verbally upend this, Smaug the stupendous
I'm stealth and undected as long as I have my precious!
Oh hey there Bilbo, it's me Legolas
You have my bow now and I'm here to kick some ass
My blonde locks so hot, flow with every minor draft
Now ready, take aim
Make way for Gandalf!
Move aside elf I'm not sure why you came
But you wanna talk hair respect my majestic mane
I conjour white light flames, so much power to my name
I can't even be contained by twenty-four mere frames!
You fools!
Have you forgotten just how often you've been caught in situations so completely void of options
When complete annihaltion of your army is all but locked in
So a thousand year old wizard needs to drop in
And be literally awesome!
I decapitated goblins, done tens of thouands of orcs in
Summon eagles to sore in and I gave life back to Thorin
For peace, I have protected you as I have promised
I won't build tiny coffins for thirteen dwarves and a hobbit
So lets roll up misty mountain cold
Your hobbit feet, now smell of mould
Were on our way, to dragon slay
And claim our long forgotten gold
The unexpected journey unfolds