With cowboy boots upon his feet
Look both ways before you cross the street
I saw you flying like a superstar
Off the hood of some offending car

The ambulance came right away
Across the street, I heard him say:
"Al I got hit by a car
You're a good friend Al, that's what you are."

Chorus:
Crushed like green velour
You can't keep him down
Who will mind the store
When Kyle's out of town?

Crushed like green velour
You can't keep him down
Who will mind the store
When Kyle's out of town?

Kyle got hurt pretty bad
I guess he earned his victim badge
He's an eagle scout with broken bones
Eating Percosets and ice cream cones
9:30 Club seems far away
But I swear I still can hear him say:
"Al I got hit by a car
You're a good friend Al, that's what you are."

Chorus:
Crushed like green velour
You can't keep him down
Who will mind the store
When Kyle's out of town?

Crushed like green velour
You can't keep him down
Who will mind the store
When Kyle's out of town?