John Mulaney
Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse: He Can't Be a Bad Guy
INT. PETER PARKER'S LAB
Peni and SP//dr finish making a new goober.
INT. AUNT MAY'S HOUSE - LIVING ROOM
Noir lays on the couch, examining a Rubiks Cube. Peni hands Peter the new goober. He hangs it around his neck with a lanyard.
SPIDER-MAN NOIR: (to Ham) This is purple.
SPIDER-HAM: No.
SPIDER-MAN NOIR: Blue?
SPIDER-HAM: No.
GWEN: Has anyone heard from Miles?
PETER: Look, he’s just clearing his head. I know the kid. He’s got what it takes. I bet you he’s going to come back through that door recharged and ready to fight.
Gwen stares at Peter, not believing a word he’s saying. Just then--
MILES STUMBLES IN, a WRECK. Heaving.
MILES: My uncle!
PETER: Hey, where have you been, we--
MILES: My Uncle Aaron, he -- he -- he's the Prowler!
PETER: Okay, slow down. Slow down, Miles.
MILES: He works for Kingpin, he tried to kill me!
SPIDER-MAN NOIR: This is a pretty hardcore origin story.
Miles fights tears. The spiders look to Peter -- who doesn't have the slightest idea of what to say.
PETER: It’s okay, it’s okay, we’re gonna figure it out.
GWEN: Were you followed?
MILES: No. I don’t think so.
But they hear a RUMBLING... and then...