[Liesl]
I am sixteen going on seventeen
I know that I'm naïve
Fellows I meet may tell me I'm sweet
And willingly I believe

[Rolf, spoken]
That's true!

[Liesl]
You are seventeen going on eighteen

[Rolf]
Actually, I'm thirty-three

[Liesl, spoken]
Wait, what?

[Rolf]
I know I look young
And I said I'm young
But I lied I'm thirty-three

[Liesl, spoken]
You're thirty-three? But, you ride a bicycle
[Rolf, spoken]
Well, that's because I'm very poor, darling

[Liesl, spoken]
And you live with your mother

[Rolf, spoken]
Wow, she's got a list. Look, you're only as old as you feel

Liesl, do you know what statutory means?

[Liesl, spoken]
Umm... No

[Rolf, spoken]
It means I looked it up and we are on the right side of the cusp

[Liesl, spoken]
I don't know, Rolf. It's a pretty big age difference and, I don't want to say this, but there's rumors that you're maybe a Nazi, maybe...

[Rolf, spoken]
Focus on the age stuff

[Liesl, spoken]
Well, I don't know if I can trust you
[Rolf]
Don't be dramatic
It's not a great look
Trust me I know what guys like

[Liesl]
But I am sixteen

[Rolf]
And I am thirty-eight
I've had some birthdays since we started talking

[Liesl, spoken]
What? Thirty-eight? I thought you said you were thirty-three

[Rolf, spoken]
Oh, let me explain

[Rolf]
I am thirty-three
Next month I'll be thirty-nine
Baby, I'm forty-one

[Liesl, spoken]
Rolf!
[Rolf, spoken]
Liesl! I know you're freaked out but this is Austria nineteen-thirty-bad. In a few months this will be the least of your worries

[Liesl, spoken]
You keep saying stuff like that

[Rolf, spoken]
Can I help it that I'm attracted to you? You're so mature and sophisticated

[Liesl, spoken]
Really? You think I seem older?

[Rolf, spoken]
Yes. What with the complaining and those hefty naturals, honestly, when I first came to the house I thought you were the mom

[Liesl, spoken]
Oh, I don't know. You're a geriatric telegram boy and I'm rich and good with puppets, so you do the math

[Rolf, spoken]
I know I'm not perfect, but I've talked to mother and I'm moving out

[Liesl, spoken]
Really? You bought a house?

[Rolf, spoken]
No, I rented, with roommates

[Rolf]
Fritz and Hans
And Kevin and Gerbils
And four other guys named Hans

[Liesl, spoken]
That's a lot of Nazis, but I still don't know how I feel about dating an older guy

[Rolf, spoken]
Oh, Liesl. Age is just a number that the government keeps track of. For example:

[Rolf]
I am forty-six

[Liesl]
That's older than my father

[Rolf]
Damn, how sexy is that

[Liesl]
I do like attention
And not to mention
My brain's
Not totally formed

[Rolf, spoken]
Oh, Liesl. I like that so much

[Maria, spoken]
That's he!

[Gaylord Von Trapp, spoken]
Stop it at once!

[Liesl, spoken]
Papa!

[Rolf, spoken]
Oh, hello, Gaylord

[Von Trapp, spoken]
Oh, shut up!

[Rolf, spoken]
But that's your name, isn't it? Gaylord Von Trapp

[Von Trapp, spoken]
Yeah, but you know what you're doing

[Maria, spoken]
Oh, just arrest the perv!

[Von Trapp, spoken]
Hey, how old are you, by the way?

[Maria]
I'm old enough, but it's still kinda dicey

[Von Trapp]
Layee odl, layee odl layee-mhmmm