[Intro]
In a universe that's infinite like many theorize ours is
There are parallel worlds where every possibility lives
So a planet's somewhere out there, their history the same as ours is written
The only difference is that
Everyone's a kitten

[Verse 1]
Kitty history, just like ours!
Kitty dinosaurs, to kitties driving cars!
Kitty history, somewhere in quantum space
Mathematically this had to take place!
Kitty world wars and kitty mass graves
Kitty colonialism and kitty slaves
It's kitty history, somewhere out in the stars!

[Verse 2]
Just like us, Kitty Columbus sailed until he saw land
But then quickly got off so he could poop in the sand
They formed the first kitty cities and kitty towns
Then they'd wake up at night just to run around
They had their own little kitty Civil War
But found some string and forgot what they were fighting for!
It's kitty history, and it's just like ours!

[Verse 3]
Little Kitty JFK got killed by Kitty Lyndon Johnson and the CIA
Then Lyndon doubled down on Kitty Vietnam
And they bought more helicopters and kitty bombs
From a company where his wife was the main stockholder
And they made a kitty fortune 'for the war was over
Kitty history, cuddly planet like ours!
[Verse 4]
A little kitty at the CIA
Who helped kill Kennedy in Dallas that day
Did so darn well that his career got a push
A kitty named George H. W. Bush
He's made CIA Director and Vice President's next
All while getting Kitty Saudi Arabian checks
It's kitty history, kitty's taking charge!

[Verse 5]
Kitty Bush waits his turn to ascend to his throne
Gets his cronies in power, Kitty U.S.A. overthrown!
The Kitty Saudis know how he can repay his debt
So he starts a war with Iraq, their number one threat
But Kitty Saddam is not ejected
And the very next year, Kitty George isn't re-elected
Kitty history, kitties need a new star!

[Verse 6]
Kitty Bush gets his sons jobs as governors
Then one steals the election 'for the other
New Kitty Bush has gotta finish the Saudi's mission
So he has a report made by a commission
That says 'To start a new war, as far as we can attest
You'd need a new Kitty Pearl Harbor.'
And we all know the rest
Kitty history, exactly like ours!
[Outro]
(Kitty history)
Out in the space-time loops
(Kitty leaders)
And kitty banking groups
(Kitty history)
Kitty surveillance states
(Kitty terrorists on kitty government pay)
(Kitty history)
Come on and sing!
Six kitty companies run everything!
It's kitty history, somewhere out in the stars!