[Spoken]
Hello everybody, this is for charity
Thank you so much for buying this album!
You bought it, right?
If not, you're an asshole

[Sung]
Trotty the Big Dick Human
Had a very massive ween
And everyone that saw it
Thought that it was quite obscene, (Oh!)

Trotty would go out walking
In a very public place (Oh!)
Strip off all his clothing
And give everyone a taste (Muah!)

The problem with old big dick Trott was his saggy balls
Oh Trott, with your balls so low
Won't you beg your dick to grow?

Then he drove to the doctor's
Whipped out his wrinkly sack
The doctor said 'Wow that's a big one
Hurry come on my back!'

Trotty, he found this quite strange
But that's not the worst he's heard
So he just got down to it
And sprayed out his lemon cuuuurrrrrd-uurrrd!

Merry Christmas!