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š Join the Affiliate Program Now I was up in Oakland with some old friends. I mean, motherfuckers Iāve known a long time. And I have changed as a person inside, right? There was an old dope dealer. Motherfucker used to⦠I used to follow him around for dope. And I always paid him. But it was always on credit or something⦠and the motherfucker acted like I was one of his pets. I started saying, āWait, motherfucker. I paid tor the dope. I didnāt live at your house. I had my own apartment.ā But he was acting like I was one of his bitches⦠and then. You know. He got real mad⦠ācause I fired on his ass. I say, āNo. Motherfucker, I wasnāt never like that.ā I had my shirt oft and I was sitting on the couch⦠and suddenly he says something about⦠When you signify. Motherfucker gets vicious. āWhat about them burned-up rings around your neck, motherfucker?ā And it hit me ācause I had never thought of myself like that⦠ācause I said. āYeah, Iāve been burnt up.ā It never had hit me like it hit him. I said, āYeah, I been burnt the fuck up.ā āCause most people I meet. I act like I aināt burned up⦠they do too. The motherfucker sneaks a peek. āA nice tattoo you have⦠all over your body.ā I guess yāall say. āFuck all that. Howād you burn up?ā You say. āHowād you burn up in your own house. Motherfucker?ā I know yāall heard all kind of stories about how I burned up basinā this⦠and ether that. None of that shit got nothing to do with that. Iām gonna tell yāall the truth tonight. You got to promise not to tell nobody. ā Can I trust ya? ā Yeah! Youāre some lyinā motherfuckers. All my friends know this to be true ācause everybody knows me. Usually before I go to bed. I have milk and cookies. And one night. I had some low-tat milk⦠and some pasteurized⦠and I mixed them together⦠and I dipped my cookie, and the shit blew up. I mean, the damnedest thing Iāve ever heard of in my life. Medical history was made. A lot of people say shit. I think about shit. Why do people think⦠All the people you ever heard of freebasinā⦠have you ever heard of anybody blowinā up? Why me? Ten million motherfuckers freebase, I gotta blow up. Iām talking about⦠I started out smoking freebase. It was like⦠I started out one time. And I shouldāve known something bad was going to happen⦠because I remember the first time I did freebase⦠I burnt my bed up. I was sitting on the bed, and somebody said⦠āRichard, the bedās on tire!ā I said. āWhat? The bedās on fire?ā Itās a weird disease. If any of you doinā it⦠you aināt gonna believe this, but if youāve been doing it⦠longer than two weeks. Youāre a junkie. Now Iām telling you so youāll know it. I know youāll tell yourself, āI aināt no fuckinā junkie.ā You cannot stop if you wanted to. Youāll go home tonight and say. āWatch me.ā You will not be able to. If you got the shit there, you will do it. Iām talking about, I started out smokinā⦠I would have a pipe and sit it down and walk eight feet away from it. Two days later. Jack. I would smoke. Iād go⦠One time. It looked like I had an appendage on my hand. It was the pipe. āCause this pipe used to tell me when to go to bed. The pipe would say, āTime to get up. Time for some smoke. Rich. Weāre not doing anything today. Fuck all your appointments. Me and you are just gonna hang out in this room together.ā Iād get mad and frustrated. People didnāt understand me. The pipeād say. āCome in the room with me. I got you covered. I know how you feel. Rich. Light me up. Hold me tor a couple of days. And weāll talk it over.ā Iām talking about a year later, jack. Iām talking about⦠Iām drawn up. fucked up and out of my mind⦠but Iām not hooked. People are trying to help me. I say⦠āYouāre just meddling in my motherfucking business! You just think because Iām having a good⦠Leave me the fuck alone!ā And Iām smokinā my shit⦠ācause my pipe would say, āI understand. They donāt know. Itās your life. They donāt have a right to fuck with you. Where were they when you needed them? Come in here with me. ācause I love ya.ā And then the pipe starts saying shit like⦠āYou let me get a little low yesterday. I donāt like that. Donāt let me get low again. Or Iām gonna hurt ya. You promise, keep me full at all times. Okay? Come on, Rich. You can do it. āCause I understand.ā And finally. Dope dealers⦠I did it so bad, dope dealers tried not to sell me none. Thatās doing it, for a dope dealer to say⦠āI aināt gonna give you no more. I canāt see you do it to yourself.ā Dope dealers donāt give a fuck about nothing usually. These motherfuckers refused to sell me cocaine. Said. āNo. Motherfucker! Youāre killing yourself!ā What? āI donāt want to see you fuck yourself up.ā I aināt never heard of dope dealers doinā that. I mean. You could sooner get free food in a Chinese restaurant. But these motherfuckers love me. Man. They say. āNo, man. Canāt you just snort again?ā And Iād lie and say, āOkay. Iām gonna snort. Just give me enough tor the weekend. Iām gonna snort it.ā āHow much you want?ā āA kilo.ā I donāt know Iām a junkie. I weigh about 103. I looked like⦠Aināt been out of my room in eight weeks. Funk is my shadow. Funk be just hanging all over me, talkinā about⦠āHey. Donāt wash.ā Then finally. My old lady called Jim Brown up. ā She said. āJim gonna come over.ā ā āFuck Jim Brown! Iāll show Jim Brown. I donāt give a fuck. Nobody afraid of Jim Brown here.ā Jim was coming in the driveway. I got all nervous. āWho is it?ā āJim Brown.ā āOh. Shit! This motherfucker aināt gonna scare me. Let me get my pipe.ā Pipe said. āCome on. Me and you will show Jim. Donāt worry. Shit, Jim donāt scare nobody.ā Jim come in the room. I started smokinā. āHowāre you doinā. Bro?ā Jim had psychology. Jimād go⦠āYou wanna go roller-skatinā?ā āPipe.ā āMaybe you wanna go tor a ride.ā Jim say. āWhat you gonna do?ā āWhat do you mean?ā āWhat you gonna do about that shit?ā āWhat? Iām doinā what I wanna do.ā āI aināt afraid of you, you know. You aināt no movie star to me. I aināt scared of you. Motherfucker. Iām your friend. What you gonna do? You gonna get well, or you gonna end our friendship? What you gonna do?ā The pipe said. āDonāt listen. He tryinā to fuck with you, Rich.ā āJim, I am a man.ā āThere aināt no doubt about that⦠but what you gonna do?ā And Jim kept saying that all through the hall. āWhat you gonna do?ā āLeave me the fuck alone! Thatās what Iām going to do⦠Iām getting the fuck away from you⦠so I donāt have to hear āWhat you gonna do? ā āCause I donāt know what the fuck Iām gonna do. Leave me the fuck alone!ā So Jim almost got me to the hospital⦠but he had to go somewhere. Like to home to eat. And I was in the room with the pipe. And the pipe said⦠āHey. Rich⦠Jimās gone.ā And it donāt matter how many times you break them motherfuckers⦠you go out and buy a new one. This is an addiction. Itās a monster. Itās pitiful. āCause I ended up on the floor looking for shit. āWell, let me smoke this.ā Itād be a piece of log. Anything. Iād say, āI wonder how my sleeve would taste.ā Iāll tell you one thing. Man. When that tire hits your ass⦠that will sober your ass up quick. I mean. I was standing there on fire. And something said⦠āWhy. Thatās a pretty blue. You know what? That looks like fire!ā Iām talking about, tire is inspirational. They should use it in the Olympics⦠ācause I did the 100-yard dash in 4.3