Phillipa Soo
The Simple Joys of Maidenhood
[GUENEVERE]
Saint Genevieve, Saint Genevieve
Where were you when my youth was sold?
Dear Genevieve, sweet Genevieve
Shan't I be young before I'm old?
[GUENEVERE & ARTHUR, spoken]
You there!
Me?
Yes! My name is Guenevere. I'm a princess sent from France to marry your king. I've run away from my carriage, and if you'll whisk me out of here and to my freedom, I can pay you a royal bridе's dowry. Well? How do you answer?
Give mе a moment, Your Highness. I'm in a multi-layered complication right now
It's simple! I wish to run away
You don't want to marry the king?
No! I've only recently reached the age of eligibility and wooability!
Oh, do I say congratulations?
And I want to know the joys of maidenhood! The conventional, ordinary, garden variety joys of maidenhood!
[GUENEVERE]
Where are the simple joys of maidenhood?
Where are all those adoring, daring boys?
Where's the knight pining so for me
He leaps to death and woe for me?
Oh, where are a maiden's simple joys?
Shan't I have the normal life a maiden should?
Shall I never be rescued in the wood?
Shall two knights never tilt for me
And let their blood be spilled for me?
Oh, where are the simple joys of maidenhood?
Shall I not be on a pedestal?
Worshipped and competed for
Not be carried off, or better still
Cause a little war
Is my fate determined by love and courtship?
No!
Clause one, fix the border
Clause two, establish trade
Clause three, deliver me
Clause four, stop the war
Where are the simple joys of maidenhood?
Are those sweet, gentle pleasures gone for good?
Shall a feud not begin for me?
Shall kith not kill their kin for me?
Oh, where are the trivial joys
Harmless, convivial joys
Where are the simple joys of maidenhood?