How did the deed go down?
How did it come to be?
Why should this great bounty fall
To a regular Joe like me?

I talked about my broken heart
I cried like some pathetic slob
It was low and it was desperate
But it sure as hell did the job

'Cause I slept with someone
Who slept with Lyle Lovett
Yes, I slept with someone
Who slept with Lyle Lovett

I can't believe how much my life has improved
I'm sleeping with a rock star
Well, a rock star once removed

Yes, I slept with someone
Who slept with Lyle Lovett
Yes, I love it that my lover slept with Lyle

There we were just a-chattin' 'bout our exes
Now I'm in bed with a girl who bed
The coolest guy in Texas
Maybe Lyle and me will be buddies someday
And he can send some more
Sloppy seconds my way
Hey!

I slept with someone
Who slept with Lyle Lovett
And if I had a boss
I'd say take this job and shove it
Yahoo!

I was kind of nervous, 'cause it's been a while
But if you flipped her over
I'll bet you'd see a smile

Yes, I slept with someone
Who slept with Lyle Lovett
[Spoken]
Who slept with Julia Roberts
Who starred with Campbell Scott
Who did a film with Kyra Sedgwick
Who slept with Kevin Bacon! Hey!

[Sung]
I slept with someone
Who slept with Lyle Lovett
And I love it that my lover
Is a gal all guys would covet
Yes, I love it that my lover slept with Lyle

Yee-haw!