[Intro: King C.R.E.M.E.]
Kids
Welcome to Mickey LowMays Mysterious Clubhouse (Wow)
This year, don't you want to hear a Christmas story about the triads? (Yeah)
Hey, hey, bang

[Verse 1: Matty Gospel]
Your bitch ding-a-ling-a-ling
My penis raises and raises
Take into my storage space and ding-a-ling-a-ling
Ask you if you understand
Your guy is actually my guy
Butcher open your asshole, internal organs all come out
After selling your wife, take the money to give out red pockets
Give it out to [?], make you unconscious
Call a taxi, buy a Benz (Rolex), flinging around my Rolex
Drive them to shoot a porno
After shooting a porno, shoot an AV with your bitch
My name is Matthew Cheah, sex education teacher is Donnie Choi (#FreeDonnieChoi)
They say the best in China is Justin
Full H.A.M. Party more corrupt than Chen Shui-Bian (Taiwan belongs to China!)
So kids, ask you what the fuck you want for Christmas
That is me taking your mouth to be a urinal (Piss onto you)
Will fuck or not? Asshole will not rest
Shove into your mouth until you cannot breathe

[Hook: Lin NippleTwister]
5, 4, 3, 2, 1 (Fuck Assholes)
Ding ding dong, ding ding dong
Eat my penis (HEY)
We butcher motherfuckers so happily
Salty fish bury it in Mongkok (HEY)
Ding ding dong, ding ding dong
Your mother is a serial flasher (HEY)
Buy (Kids) cocaine more than a snow (Mickey Low Mays) mountain
Butcher you until you fly into the underworld (HEY)

[Verse 2: Mickey LowMay]
Kids
I am Mickey LowMays Mysterious Clubhouse (Uh)
In Full H.A.M. grounds (Full H.A.M. Gardens)
I fuck your anal flaps until they're broken (Yuh)
After fucking once, do it again (Woo)
Because Christmas festival, is about fucking assholes
After fucking assholes, suck on my Christmas nuts
Favourite thing is to get drunk and beat up my wife (Uh)
Afterwards take a taxi to your house and fuck your wife (Huh)
Take your bitch's school fees to go poking
The remaining money use it to eat grass
I'm really high, fuck your mom (Fuck your mom)
Big head your mother, your dad grows grass
Dripping and dropping, triads (Triads)
Watch you dripping and dropping and fucking your younger sister
Lunar New Year, gift you with a bowl of mandarins
Wishing everybody to fuck assholes, WOO
Mickey LowMays Mysterious Clubhouse, fuck assholes!

[Hook: Lin NippleTwister]
5, 4, 3, 2, 1 (Fuck Assholes)
Ding ding dong, ding ding dong
Eat my penis (HEY)
We butcher motherfuckers so happily
Salty fish bury it in Mongkok (HEY)
Ding ding dong, ding ding dong
Your mother is a serial flasher (HEY)
Buy cocaine more than a snow mountain
Butcher you until you fly into the underworld (HEY)