[Chorus 1]
It's beginning to look a lot like sepsis
When the BP’s low
Heart is racing and brain is dim
Send a lactate on ice and then
Place central lines ‘cause Santa's dyin' without Vanco
It’s beginning to look a lot like sepsis
When the temp is high
CVP is way down again
Give a bolus or maybe 10
Ain't no silent night

[Bridge]
A pair of blood cultures then a UA and chest film is the list of tests to begin
Entering them in the EHR can be an hour of clicking and then
The whole thing freezes, Jesus, start that order set again

[Chorus 2]
It's beginning to look a lot like sepsis
Hang the dang Neo
Time is clicking down on the clock
When Santa's got septic shock
All he wants for Christmas is some urine flow
It's beginning to look just like malpractice
When you miss the signs
Early management is the key
If Santa is to see
Another Christmas time (Hey!)
[Outro]
Give old St. Nick some pressers, baby!
All those jingle bells I hear, are vent alarms
Hang another bag of eggnog, it's going to be long night
Ho, ho, holy crap!
Happy Holidays, from ZDogg Industries
Our family to yours
(Happy Holidays)