[Katt Williams]
It is not cool to get high and eat up all yo baby's cereal
That shit is not cool
You wake up, yo baby already in the kitchen crying. Just (crying)

"Thank God you woke up daddy! You remember you put the Cocoa Puffs on top of the fridgidator? Now they not even up there!"
Now you so embarrassed, you gotta play it off with the n***a. You (looks puzzled)
"N***a they damn sho ain't up here. Them muthafuckin insurgents done come in our house and stole..."

(crowd breaks out in laughter)

Why the fuck they give me a cup bigger than me? A n***a gon climb out the cup?
I'm just saying, you gotta be careful. Life is short. Enjoy yo muthafuckin life. Do whatever you can for yo life to be the shit
I don't fuck wit n***a that don't keep it pushing
You gotta be fucking wit n***as that's doing better, and better, and better, and better
Stop fucking wit n***as that's doing the same shit
I don't even go to n***as' birthday parties if they doing the same shit they was doing last year
N***a, no. Been there done that. See ya pimpin
All I'm saying is, if you been selling weed since 1994 and you ain't bumped up to cocaine by 2006 n***a, maybe you need to become a Jehovah's Witness or a Real Estate Consultant
We tryna get it pushing round here. Life is too muthafuckin short (breaks out in laughter)
Look at all the drug dealers
(Crowd roars)