[Verse]
Well, here we are, the four of us
In total shock, me and her
I closed my mouth and swallowed spit
As I'm thinking to myself, "This is some deep shit!"
And I said, "So you're gonna tell me he's the one you been talking to?"
He says, "Yes", I says, "No"
He says, "Yes", I says, "No", he says, "It's the truth!"
I yell, "All of y'all ass is crazy, let me up out this door
Because this is way more than I bargained for"
And then she says, "Wait, I'm sure we can all fix this"
Then I said, "I'm late, plus I ain't got a damn thing to do with this!"
But then she said, "But wouldn't you like to know just how it all began?"
Then I thought to myself, and said, "Quick, you got three minutes"
And then it got real quiet, I said, "Somebody start talking"
Then she said, "My God, Rufus! I've got just one question:
How could you do something like this? I'm so hurt!"
He looked at her and said, "Bitch please, you've got your nerve
With all your club hopping, lying saying you was shopping
And now here you are in our home, and you're calling me wrong?"
She said, "Okay, you busted me!
And that much I agree, you've caught me cheating!
But this is a little extreme!"
He said, "You are my wife sleeping behind my back
And now I come home and you got him in the closet, how extreme is that?!"
And she said, "But she's a he!"
Then he said, "Please, you can't judge me"
She said, "Rufus, this is crazy!"
Then I said, "Stop arguing!
I did not stay here to hear y'all chew each other out
So, get to the point, or I swear I'm out!"
"Excuse me, please, but I think I can explain what's going on in here
My name is Chuck and I been knowing Rufus about a year
At midnight creeping around with him has been a living hell
Sneaking in and out of hotels"
I said, "Brother, spare me the details!"
Then Rufus said, "Chuck, please! Don't say nothing else!"
Then she screams, "Rufus, you son of a bitch"
He says, "Cathy, go to hell!"
I said, "I thought you said your name was Mary
That what you said at the party
Man this is gettin' scary, I'm gonna shoot somebody"
Then Rufus starts yelling and screaming, saying, "Cathy, this is all your fault!"
She throws a pillow at him and says, "You were creeping too
The only difference is you didn't get caught!"
Chuck screamed out, "WE'RE IN LOVE!"
Cathy says, "Love my ass!"
Rufus said they're getting married, then I shoot one in the air!
Then I said, "Not another one of you sons of bitches say a word!
'Cause all this shit I'm going through is unheard!"
I grabbed my cellular
Said, "This is so wrong", I call up my home
And a man picks up the phone (phone, phone, phone...)
"Hello? Hello?"